Search

Should Taylor Swift be taught alongside Shakespeare? A professor of literature says yes

<a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/liam-e-semler-1507004">Liam E Semler</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a> Does Taylor Swift’s music belong in the English classroom? No, obviously. We should teach the classics, like <a href="https://www.folger.edu/explore/shakespeares-works/shakespeares-sonnets/">Shakespeare’s Sonnets</a>. After all, they have stood the test of time. It’s 2024 and he was born in 1564, and she’s only 34. What’s more, she is a pop singer, not a poet. Sliding her into the classroom would be yet another example of a dumbed-down curriculum. It’s ridiculous. It makes everyone look bad. I’ve heard all that. And plenty more like it. But none of it is right. Well, the dates might be, but not the assumptions – about Shakespeare, about English, about teaching, and about Swift. Swift is, by the way, a poet. She sees herself this way and her songs bear her out. In Sweet Nothing, on the <a href="https://pitchfork.com/reviews/albums/taylor-swift-midnights/">Midnights</a> album, she sings: <blockquote> On the way home I wrote a poem You say “What a mind” This happens all the time. </blockquote> I’m sure it does. Swift is relentlessly productive as a songwriter. With Midnights, she picked up <a href="https://edition.cnn.com/2024/02/04/entertainment/taylor-swift-album-of-the-year-grammys/index.html">her fourth Grammy for Album of the Year</a>. And here we are, on the brink of another studio album, <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Tortured_Poets_Department">The Tortured Poets Department</a>, somehow written and produced amid the gargantuan success of Midnights and the Eras World Tour. <h2>An ally of literature</h2> Regardless of what The Tortured Poets Department ends up being about, Swift is already a firm ally of literature and reading. She is <a href="https://www.cbsnews.com/news/taylor-swift-donates-6000-books-to-library/">a donor of thousands of books</a> to public libraries in the United States, an advocate to schoolchildren of the importance of reading and songwriting, and a lover of the process of crafting lyrics. In a <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XnbCSboujF4">2016 Vogue interview</a>, Swift declared with glee that, if she were a teacher, she would teach English. The literary references in her songs are endlessly noted. “I love Shakespeare as much as the next girl,” she wrote in a <a href="https://www.elle.com/uk/life-and-culture/a26546099/taylor-swift-pop-music/">2019 article for Elle</a>. <figure><iframe src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/mdgKhdcQrNw?wmode=transparent&start=0" width="440" height="260" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen"></iframe></figure> Her interview Read Every Day gives a good sense of this. Swift speaks about her writing process in ways that make it accessible. She explains how songs come to her anywhere and everywhere, like an idea randomly appearing “on a cloud” that becomes the first piece in a “puzzle” that will be assembled into a song. She furtively whisper-sings song ideas into her phone when out with friends. In her <a href="https://www.thelineofbestfit.com/news/read-taylor-swifts-full-nsai-songwriter-artist-of-the-decade-award-speech">acceptance speech for the Nashville Songwriter-Artist of the Decade Award</a> in 2022, Swift explained how she writes in three broad styles, imagining she is holding either a “quill”, a “fountain pen”, or a “glitter gel pen”. Songcraft is a joyous challenge for her. If, as teachers of literature, we are too proud to credit Swift’s plainly expressed love of English (regardless of whether we like her songs or not), we are likely missing something. To bluntly rule her out of the English classroom feels more absurd than allowing her in. Clio Doyle, a lecturer in early modern literature, has <a href="https://theconversation.com/why-taylor-swift-belongs-on-english-literature-degree-courses-219660">summarised</a> Swift’s suitability for English in a recent article which concludes: <blockquote> The important thing isn’t whether or not Swift might be the new Shakespeare. It’s that the discipline of English literature is flexible, capacious and open-minded. A class on reading Swift’s work as literature is just another English class, because every English class requires grappling with the idea of reading anything as literature. Even Shakespeare. </blockquote> Doyle reminds us Swift’s work has been taught at universities for a while now and, inevitably, the singer’s name keeps cropping up in relation to Shakespeare. This isn’t just a case of fandom gone wild or Shakespeare professors, like <a href="https://www.smh.com.au/culture/music/why-taylor-swift-is-a-literary-giant-by-a-shakespeare-professor-20230518-p5d9cn.html">Jonathan Bate</a>, gone rogue. The global interest in the world-first academic <a href="https://swiftposium2024.com/">Swiftposium</a> is a good measure of how things are trending. Moreover, it is wrong to think Swift’s songs are included in units of study purely to be adored. Her wide appeal is part of her appeal to educators, but that doesn’t mean her art is uncritically included. The reverse is true. Claire Hansen <a href="https://www.smh.com.au/national/pop-star-philosopher-poet-taylor-swift-is-shaking-up-how-we-think-20240207-p5f342.html">taught Swift in one of her literature units at the Australian National University</a> last year precisely because this influential singer-songwriter prompts students to explore the boundaries of the canon. I will be teaching Midnights and Shakespeare’s Sonnets together in a literature unit at the University of Sydney this semester. Why? Not because I think Swift is as good as Shakespeare, or because I think she is not as good as Shakespeare. These statements are fine as personal opinions, but unhelpful as blanket declarations without context. The nature of English as a discipline is far more complex, interesting and valuable than a labelling and ranking exercise. <h2>Teaching Midnights and Shakespeare’s Sonnets</h2> I teach Shakespeare’s sonnets as exquisite poems, reflective of their time and culture. I also teach three modern artworks that shed contemporary light on the sonnets. The first is Jen Bervin’s 2004 book <a href="https://www.jenbervin.com/projects/nets">Nets</a>. Bervin prints a selection of the sonnets, one per page, in grey text. In each of these grey sonnets, some of Shakespeare’s words and phrases are printed in black and thus stand out boldly. The result is a <a href="https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/palimpsest">palimpsest</a>. The Shakespearean sonnet appears lying, like fertile soil, beneath the briefer poem that emerges from it. Bervin describes this technique as a stripping down of the sonnets to “nets” in order “to make the space of the poems open, porous, possible – a divergent elsewhere”. The creative relationship between the Shakespearean base and Bervin’s proverb-like poems proves that, as Bervin says, “when we write poems, the history of poetry is with us”. The second text is Luke Kennard’s prizewinning 2021 collection <a href="https://www.pennedinthemargins.co.uk/index.php/2021/04/notes-on-the-sonnets/">Notes on the Sonnets</a>. Kennard recasts the sonnets as a series of entertaining prose poems. Each poem responds to a specific Shakespearean sonnet, recasting it as the freewheeling thought bubble of a fictional attendee at an unappealing house party. In an interview with C.D. Rose, Kennard <a href="https://thequietus.com/articles/30078-luke-kennard-interview-the-answer-to-everything-notes-on-the-sonnets">explains</a> how his house party design puts the reader <blockquote> in between a public and private space, you’re at home and you’re out, you’re free, you’re enclosed. And that’s similar in the sonnets. </blockquote> The third text is Swift’s Midnights. Unlike Bervin’s and Kennard’s collections, in which individual pieces relate to specific sonnets, there is no explicit adaptation. Instead, Midnights raises broader themes. <h2>Deep connection</h2> In her Elle article, Swift describes songwriting as akin to photography. She strives to capture moments of lived experience: <blockquote> The fun challenge of writing a pop song is squeezing those evocative details into the catchiest melody you can possibly think of. I thrive on the challenge of sprinkling personal mementos and shreds of reality into a genre of music that is universally known for being, well, universal. </blockquote> Her point is that the pop songs that “cut through the most are actually the most detailed” in their snippets of reality and biography. She says “people are reaching out for connection and comfort” and “music lovers want some biographical glimpse into the world of our narrator, a hole in the emotional walls people put up around themselves to survive”. Midnights exemplifies this. It is a concept album built on the idea that midnight is a time for pursuit of and confrontation with the self – or better, the selves. Swift says the songs form “the full picture of the intensities of that mystifying, mad hour”. The album, she says, is “a journey through terrors and sweet dreams” for those “who have tossed and turned and decided to keep the lanterns lit and go searching – hoping that just maybe, when the clock strikes twelve […] we’ll meet ourselves”. Swift claims that Midnights lets listeners in through her protective walls to enable deep connection: <blockquote> I really don’t think I’ve delved this far into my insecurities in this detail before. I struggle with the idea that my life has become unmanageably sized and […] I just struggle with the idea of not feeling like a person. </blockquote> Midnights is not a sonnet collection, but it has fascinating parallels. There is no firm narrative through-line. Nor is there a through-line in early modern sonnet collections such as Shakespeare’s. Instead, both gather songs and poems that let us see aspects of the singing or speaking persona’s thoughts, emotions and experiences. Shakespeare’s speaker is also troubled through the night in sonnets 27, 43 and 61. The sonnets come in thematic clusters, pairs and mini-sequences. It can be interesting to ask students if they can see something similar in the order of songs on the Midnights album – or the “3am” edition with its seven extra tracks, or the “Til Dawn” edition with another three songs. Paul Edmondson and Stanley Wells, in their edition of <a href="https://www.cambridge.org/core/books/all-the-sonnets-of-shakespeare/AE1912C43BE4F50391B25B83C0C03B1F">All the Sonnets of Shakespeare</a>, say Shakespeare’s collection is “the most idiosyncratic gathering of sonnets in the period” because he “uses the sonnet form to work out his intimate thoughts and feelings”. This connects very well with the agenda of Midnights. Both collections are piecemeal psychic landscapes. The singing or speaking voice sometimes feels autobiographical – compare, for example, sonnets 23, 129, 135-6 and 145 to Swift’s songs Anti-hero, You’re On Your Own, Kid, Sweet Nothing, and Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve. At other times the voices feel less autobiographical. Often there is no way to distinguish one from the other. Swift’s songs and Shakespeare’s Sonnets are meditations on deeply personal aspects of their narrators’ experiences. They present us with encounters, memories, relationships, values and claims. Swift’s persona is that of a self-reflective singer, just as Shakespeare’s is that of a self-reflective sonneteer. Both focus on love in all its shades. Both present themselves as vulnerable to industry rivals and pressures. Both dwell on issues of power. <h2>Close reading</h2> Shakespeare’s sonnets are rewarding texts for close reading because of their poetic intricacy. Students can look at end rhymes and internal rhymes, the way the argument progresses through <a href="https://www.poetryfoundation.org/learn/glossary-terms/quatrain">quatrains</a>, the positioning of the “turn”, which is often in line 9 or 13, and the way the final couplet wraps things up (or doesn’t). The songs on Midnights are also rewarding because Swift has a great vocabulary, a love of metaphor, terrific turns of phrase, and a strong sense of symmetry and balance in wording. More complex songs like Maroon and Question…? are great for detailed analysis. Karma and Mastermind are simpler, yet contain plenty of metaphoric language to be unpacked for meaning and aesthetic effectiveness. Shakespeare’s controlled use of metaphor in Sonnet 73 makes for a telling contrast. The Great War, Glitch and Snow on the Beach are good for exploring how well a single extended metaphor can function to carry the meaning of a song. Sonnets 8, 18, 143 and 147 can be explored in similar terms. Just as students can analyse the “turn” or concluding couplet in a Shakespearean sonnet to see how it reshapes the poem, they can do the same with songs on Midnights. Swift is known for writing effective bridges that contribute fresh, important content towards the end of a song: Sweet Nothing, Mastermind and Dear Reader are excellent examples. Such unexpected pairings are valuable because they require close attention and careful articulation of what is similar and what is not. Shakespeare’s Sonnet 129, for example (the famous one on lust), and Swift’s Bigger than the Whole Sky (a powerful expression of loss) make for a gripping comparison of how intense feeling can be expressed poetically. Or consider Sonnet 29 (“When in disgrace with fortune and men’s eyes”) and Sweet Nothing: both celebrate intimacy as a defence against the pressures of the public world. How about High Infidelity and Sonnet 138 (where love and self-deception coexist), considered in terms of truth in relationships? There is nothing to lose and plenty to gain in teaching Swift’s Midnights and Shakespeare’s Sonnets together. There’s no dumbing-down involved. And there’s no need for reductive assertions about who is “better”.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/223312/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/liam-e-semler-1507004">Liam E Semler</a>, Professor of Early Modern Literature, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a> Image credits: Getty Images This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/should-taylor-swift-be-taught-alongside-shakespeare-a-professor-of-literature-says-yes-223312">original article</a>.

Music

14 personal finance tips you were never taught – but need to know

Take a day to think about large purchases to avoid impulse buys “Delaying your purchases for a day gives you time to think about whether or not you really need the items, and it curbs regrettable impulse buys,” advises Marc Diana, CEO of MoneyTips. “Sale items may be an exception to this rule, but even then, question how badly you need the item compared to saving or investing the money you would use to purchase it. When times are tough, and you’re cutting expenses, would you rather have a rarely worn $300 pair of shoes or $300 cash?” Budgets are freeing, not constricting Says financial educator Tiffany Aliche, “Keeping a budget allows you to say yes to your goals in a strategic way. If you have a budget, you can save for the holiday, house or car you want to get. You can look at it as ‘No dining out,’ but I see it as ‘Yes to a trip to Paris.’ A budget is not a NO plan, but a YES plan with actual steps towards achieving your goals.” Budget with the 50/20/30 rule Lynn Toomey, co-founder of Your Retirement Advisor, suggests following this easy budgeting rule: Use 50 per cent of your income for non-discretionary necessities like food, rent/house payment, utilities, and transportation. Put aside 20 per cent of your income for an emergency fund (three to six months’ salary is a good target), retirement, savings, and to pay off any debts. Use 30 per cent of your income for discretionary (non-essential) spending such as entertainment, holidays and gifts. Penny-pinching is not the road to wealth Spending less doesn’t mean you’ll have more. Saving is a good way to stabilise your finances, but you still need to invest. “Pretend there are two islands,” advises Aliche, who is also known as The Budgetnista: “Financially Stuck Island and Wealthy Island.” She says that your savings can be like a car – you can’t drive off Financially Stuck Island without a bridge. Investing is the bridge to financial success. “To get from one island to another, you need to get in your savings car and drive it over your investment bridge.” It’s OK to put yourself before your kids Many people want their kids to go to university, says Aliche, “but it’s more important for you to save enough for retirement. Because the best gift you can give your child is not a free ride to school, but rather not to be a financial burden on them when it’s time to start their own family. Kids can get student loans; no one is going to lend you money without collateral when you’re retired.” Financial advisors aren’t only for wealthy people Millions of people have trillions invested in stocks, bonds, mutual funds and other stock exchange investments, but just because you can easily make trades yourself doesn’t mean you should. “Why not do what you do best to earn money and let a trained professional invest it for you?” asks Brian Saranovitz, president of Your Retirement Advisor. “A recent Vanguard Investments study indicated that integrating proper retirement strategies can add as much as 3 per cent efficient return to a retirement portfolio.” Adds Aliche, “You need to purposefully seek out knowledge. If you break a leg, you know that you need to go to a doctor. With personal finance, people have got the notion that they could just fix it themselves. When it comes to investing, don’t be afraid to seek professional help.” Get a clear picture of yourself at 80 Barring tragedy, you will live to a ripe, old age. Aliche recommends naming your 80-year-old image of yourself. “Mine is Wanda. I imagine Wanda sitting on the front steps in her yard. People feel disconnected from their older self. The more you can picture her, the better. I don’t want to see her mopping floors at 80. When I’m making a decision, I think, ‘How will this affect Wanda?’ If I dip into my retirement funds to buy an expensive car, that’s going to hurt Wanda.” If it’s easier, pretend you’re living with your grandfather or grandmother. “You’re not going to tell Granny, ‘You have to go to work. We need the money,’” she says. You can never have too much retirement savings Says Lynn Toomey, co-founder of Your Retirement Advisor, “Life is good. Retirement is better, if you are prepared.” She points out that retirement is laden with potential costs, such as healthcare, longevity, market volatility and inflation. “Even if you think you’re saving enough and have assets, it still may not be enough. The earlier you start saving and investing, the longer compound interest can work its magic to help you achieve a successful retirement.” Don’t blow your tax refund “What are you planning on doing with your tax refund?” asks financial advisor Mike Zaino. “If you’re like most people, the world of instant gratification is beckoning. It could be extremely damaging to your retirement account, however, especially given the time value of money and what Albert Einstein called ‘The eighth wonder of the world” – compound interest.” Ask current lenders for a better rate “Banks, credit unions and other lenders are keenly aware of their competition,” says Diana of MoneyTips.com. “If your credit score qualifies you for a better rate from another credit card issuer or lender, ask them to match the rate. There’s no downside to asking; the worst they could do is refuse.” Asking for your credit limit to be raised can improve your credit score Keep your credit utilisation – the amount of credit you use compared to your credit limit – low to boost your all-important credit, advises Diana. “You can borrow less, or you can ask for a raise in your credit limit.” A recent study from CreditCards.com found that only 28 per cent of respondents have never asked for an increase in their credit limit. However, a whopping 89 per cent of those who asked for a credit limit increase received one. Unless they have a high annual fee, don’t close your old credit cards “The longer your stable credit history, the better it reflects on your credit score,” explains Diana. “The age of accounts is averaged over all of your credit accounts, so closing an older account that is infrequently used actually harms your credit score in two ways: it lowers your credit limit, which raises your credit utilisation; and it lowers your average account age. If you have an old card with a decent credit limit, use it at least annually to keep it open. But don’t forget to pay the bill on time!” Don’t ever co-sign a loan “Co-signing a loan isn’t just vouching for someone’s character,” explains Toomey. “Understand that if the borrower doesn’t pay, then you’re responsible for every single missed payment. If they don’t pay, it’s your credit that will be ruined.” Being debt-free should not be your goal Says Aliche, creator of the Live Richer Challenge, “People focus on getting out of debt. If they use that money to grow wealth instead of getting rid of debt, they could be debt-free faster. Do you pay off your student loans to get debt-free, or invest money in your business to grow and secure wealth for yourself? If you focus on being debt-free, that’s all you’ll be. If you focus on building wealth, then you can be wealthy and debt-free.” Image credits: Getty Images This article originally appeared on <a href="https://www.readersdigest.co.nz/food-home-garden/money/14-personal-finance-tips-you-were-never-taught-but-need-to-know?pages=1" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Reader's Digest</a>.

Money & Banking

More personal finance tips you were never taught

We asked half a dozen personal finance experts money-saving and wealth-creating tips that most people are never taught. Get a clear picture of yourself at 80 Barring tragedy, you will live to a ripe, old age. Aliche recommends naming your 80-year-old image of yourself. “Mine is Wanda. I imagine Wanda sitting on the front steps in her yard. People feel disconnected from their older self. The more you can picture her, the better. I don’t want to see her mopping floors at 80. When I’m making a decision, I think, ‘How will this affect Wanda?’ If I dip into my retirement funds to buy an expensive car, that’s going to hurt Wanda.” If it’s easier, pretend you’re living with your grandfather or grandmother. “You’re not going to tell Granny, ‘You have to go to work. We need the money,’” she says. You can never have too much retirement savings Says Lynn Toomey, co-founder of Your Retirement Advisor, “Life is good. Retirement is better, if you are prepared.” She points out that retirement is laden with potential costs, such as healthcare, longevity, market volatility and inflation. “Even if you think you’re saving enough and have assets, it still may not be enough. The earlier you start saving and investing, the longer compound interest can work its magic to help you achieve a successful retirement.” Don’t blow your tax refund “What are you planning on doing with your tax refund?” asks financial advisor Mike Zaino. “If you’re like most people, the world of instant gratification is beckoning. It could be extremely damaging to your retirement account, however, especially given the time value of money and what Albert Einstein called ‘The eighth wonder of the world” – compound interest.” Ask current lenders for a better rate “Banks, credit unions and other lenders are keenly aware of their competition,” says Diana of MoneyTips.com. “If your credit score qualifies you for a better rate from another credit card issuer or lender, ask them to match the rate. There’s no downside to asking; the worst they could do is refuse.” Asking for your credit limit to be raised can improve your credit score Keep your credit utilisation – the amount of credit you use compared to your credit limit – low to boost your all-important credit, advises Diana. “You can borrow less, or you can ask for a raise in your credit limit.” A recent study from CreditCards.com found that only 28 per cent of respondents have never asked for an increase in their credit limit. However, a whopping 89 per cent of those who asked for a credit limit increase received one. Written by Jeff Hoyt. This article first appeared in <a rel="noopener" href="https://www.readersdigest.co.nz/food-home-garden/money/14-personal-finance-tips-you-were-never-taught-but-need-to-know" target="_blank">Reader’s Digest</a>. For more of what you love from the world’s best-loved magazine, <a rel="noopener" href="http://readersdigest.innovations.co.nz/c/readersdigestemailsubscribe?utm_source=over60&utm_medium=articles&utm_campaign=RDSUB&keycode=WRA87V" target="_blank">here’s our best subscription offer.</a> Image: Getty Images <img style="width: 100px !important; height: 100px !important;" src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/7820640/1.png" alt="" data-udi="umb://media/f30947086c8e47b89cb076eb5bb9b3e2" />

Money & Banking

5 personal finance tips you were never taught – but need to know

We asked half a dozen personal finance experts money-saving and wealth-creating tips that most people are never taught. Take a day to think about large purchases to avoid impulse buys “Delaying your purchases for a day gives you time to think about whether or not you really need the items, and it curbs regrettable impulse buys,” advises Marc Diana, CEO of MoneyTips. “Sale items may be an exception to this rule, but even then, question how badly you need the item compared to saving or investing the money you would use to purchase it. When times are tough, and you’re cutting expenses, would you rather have a rarely worn $300 pair of shoes or $300 cash?” Budgets are freeing, not constricting Says financial educator Tiffany Aliche, “Keeping a budget allows you to say yes to your goals in a strategic way. If you have a budget, you can save for the holiday, house or car you want to get. You can look at it as ‘No dining out,’ but I see it as ‘Yes to a trip to Paris.’ A budget is not a NO plan, but a YES plan with actual steps towards achieving your goals.” Budget with the 50/20/30 rule Lynn Toomey, co-founder of Your Retirement Advisor, suggests following this easy budgeting rule: Use 50 per cent of your income for non-discretionary necessities like food, rent/house payment, utilities, and transportation. Put aside 20 per cent of your income for an emergency fund (three to six months’ salary is a good target), retirement, savings, and to pay off any debts. Use 30 per cent of your income for discretionary (non-essential) spending such as entertainment, holidays and gifts. Penny-pinching is not the road to wealth Spending less doesn’t mean you’ll have more. Saving is a good way to stabilise your finances, but you still need to invest. “Pretend there are two islands,” advises Aliche, who is also known as The Budgetnista: “Financially Stuck Island and Wealthy Island.” She says that your savings can be like a car – you can’t drive off Financially Stuck Island without a bridge. Investing is the bridge to financial success. “To get from one island to another, you need to get in your savings car and drive it over your investment bridge.” Financial advisors aren’t only for wealthy people Millions of people have trillions invested in stocks, bonds, mutual funds and other stock exchange investments, but just because you can easily make trades yourself doesn’t mean you should. “Why not do what you do best to earn money and let a trained professional invest it for you?” asks Brian Saranovitz, president of Your Retirement Advisor. “A recent Vanguard Investments study indicated that integrating proper retirement strategies can add as much as 3 per cent efficient return to a retirement portfolio.” Adds Aliche, “You need to purposefully seek out knowledge. If you break a leg, you know that you need to go to a doctor. With personal finance, people have got the notion that they could just fix it themselves. When it comes to investing, don’t be afraid to seek professional help.” Written by Jeff Hoyt. This article first appeared in <a rel="noopener" href="https://www.readersdigest.co.nz/food-home-garden/money/14-personal-finance-tips-you-were-never-taught-but-need-to-know" target="_blank">Reader’s Digest</a>. For more of what you love from the world’s best-loved magazine, <a rel="noopener" href="http://readersdigest.innovations.co.nz/c/readersdigestemailsubscribe?utm_source=over60&utm_medium=articles&utm_campaign=RDSUB&keycode=WRA87V" target="_blank">here’s our best subscription offer.</a> Image: Getty Images

Money & Banking

Self-taught 14-year-old artist offered thousands for paintings

During lockdown, it was not uncommon for most people to try a new hobby they had been putting off. But for 14-year-old Makenzy, it was a starting point for incredible success. During a period of self-isolation in Wales, Makenzy Beard found some old acrylic paints and an easel that once belonged to her mother, and decided to try her hand at painting. Her first piece, an incredible portrait of her farming neighbour John Tucker, went viral on social media. She told the <a href="https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-wales-57670603">BBC</a> that the portrait took about 20 hours to complete over a three-week period. <blockquote style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" class="instagram-media" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/COGXvlHH1Ax/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"></div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"></div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"></div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"></div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"></div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" rel="noopener" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/COGXvlHH1Ax/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank">A post shared by Makenzy Beard (@makenzy_beard)</a> </div> </blockquote> "I was very busy at the time I decided to do this one, so I was taking five minutes before school, an hour after school before sport. It was all broken down, I never spent one long extended period of time on it", she said. Makezny said her subject John “is a wonderful person and has a really lovely, kind and friendly demeanour," and thought he would be the perfect person to paint. The post racked up thousands of likes online, as she was encouraged by art fans around the world to keep up her extraordinary talent. <blockquote style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" class="instagram-media" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/CSpfvXipcmU/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"></div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"></div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"></div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"></div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"></div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" rel="noopener" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/CSpfvXipcmU/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank">A post shared by Makenzy Beard (@makenzy_beard)</a> </div> </blockquote> After adding more works to her collection, Makenzy has had her works displayed in a gallery in Cardiff. Some pieces have captured the attention of international art dealers, with one of her paintings selling for $18,000AUD. One of the pieces in her showcase is a portrait of her grandfather Bernard Davis, but Makenzy said she will be keeping the artwork due to its sentimental value. <blockquote style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" class="instagram-media" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/CUid6kGo0n6/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"></div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"></div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"></div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"></div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"></div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" rel="noopener" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/CUid6kGo0n6/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank">A post shared by Makenzy Beard (@makenzy_beard)</a> </div> </blockquote> Despite having international offers on her artwork, Makenzy is still keeping her options open in regards to her future. While she is passionate about art, the 14-year-old is happy just keeping her talents as a hobby as she focuses on school. Director of Blackwater Gallery, Kimberley Lewis, said, "I think anyone can be a good portrait artist, but I think it takes a lot to show real personality and the soul of a person through their pieces and I think for someone so young, Makenzy does this brilliantly." Image credits: Instagram @makenzy_beard

Art

10 cooking tricks that are only taught in culinary schools

How to get the perfect steak If you’re one of the many people who takes a piece of meat out of the refrigerator or freezer and throws it directly on the barbecue, it’s time to learn the error of your ways. For the best-tasting steak, you’re much better off taking it out of the cold and letting it sit for an hour or two before bringing the heat. If you start cooking the steak when it’s already at room temperature, it will cook much more evenly. Yes, it’ll take longer, but the difference is worth it! How to get delicious juicy meat How are restaurant chefs able to get their chicken and pork chops to have that perfect delicious amount of juiciness? The answer is (fairly) simple: they brine it. Nope, brining’s not just for turkeys! Soaking the meat in cold salt water infuses it with rich flavour and a juicy texture even before you cook it. Brining also helps keep your chicken or pork from drying out and provides a safeguard against overcooking. Don't be scared of salt Culinary students learn pretty quickly not to be stingy with the salt. “For the first several months of school, I kept getting docked for serving under-seasoned food,” Culinary Institute of America graduate Jesse Szewczyk told BuzzFeed. If your food tastes bland, there’s a good chance it just needs more salt. If you’re hesitant to ramp up your salt addition, use this trick to avoid over-salting: garnish your creation with salt continuously as you cook, rather than salting it heavily at the beginning and/or the end. Sprinkle the salt from up high so that it will be evenly distributed throughout your dish. Sugar makes a great seasoning It’s not just for baked goods anymore. If you add a pinch (or three) of sugar to a recipe that uses tomatoes, you’ll notice a delicious difference. The sugar counteracts the natural sour taste of the tomatoes to create a rich, pleasant flavour. Szewczyk even noticed that adding a bit of sugar to a dish he was making with slightly out-of-season tomatoes made it “taste like it was made with perfectly ripe ones.” How to produce a perfectly-shaped burger patty This super-simple tip will help you step up your hamburger game – and it takes less than ten seconds. First, toss the patty down hard on your cutting board to force out the air bubbles. Then, press an indent into the center of the patty. These two simple actions prevent the patty from puffing up in the middle and create a nice, even burger. They also keep the burger from bubbling while you cook it. How to prepare a clear broth The trick to making the clearest – and tastiest – chicken broth involves lots of chicken and lots of patience. Take your chicken meat – and bones, if you’re using them – and cook them in a small amount of water (just enough to cover them) for at least three hours. Cook on a low heat, and make sure to skim off any suds that float to the top. This will make the stock clearer and tastier. Don’t add your vegetables right away, wait to add them after about an hour and a half to two hours. For the clearest broth possible, strain the liquid through cheesecloth. A little olive oil goes a long way What do pasta dishes, pizzas, fish dishes and meat dishes all have in common? Well, aside from being super delicious, they can all be enhanced with a dollop of olive oil. Many professional chefs, including culinary instructor Sydney Willcox, top off nearly all of their dishes with a sprinkling of this liquid gold. Make sure you’re using a good quality extra virgin olive oil, which will add a flavourful kick and “make for a silky finish,” Willcox promised StyleCaster. How to cook a perfectly crusted fish One word: heat. You can’t produce a perfectly seared piece of fish without a piping hot pan. “If you are looking for a sear, you need to bring on high levels of heat,” says Willcox. Willcox also warns against overcrowding the pan while searing; that could seriously diminish the heat and prevent your fish from developing that succulent brown crust. Keeping the pan nice and hot also prevents bits of the fish from sticking to the pan when you flip it over; when cold, the proteins in the fish are more likely to adhere to the metal. The only reason to use non-stick pans They sound good in theory, but non-stick pans really aren’t going to produce the best dishes. If you’re cooking anything that you want to develop some kind of crust – think meat or fish – avoid using your non-stick pan. “It’s a different kind of heat, with non-stick pans,” chef Amanda Cohen told BuzzFeed. “It’s not quite as hot, it doesn’t get things as crispy since it’s really protecting things from the heat underneath.” The non-stick coating acts as a barrier between the heat and your food, which can prevent it from developing that rich, crispy texture. Don’t toss your non-stick pan altogether, though – it’s still great for eggs, pancakes and French toast. How to cook the tastiest pasta Want restaurant-quality, flavourful pasta no matter what sauce you’re tossing it in? Before your pasta is fully cooked, transfer it into the sauce for the last few minutes of cooking. Doing this will help the pasta absorb the flavour and help the sauce cling to them better. If the sauce comes out too thick, add a little bit of the leftover pasta water until it reaches the texture you want. Written by Meghan Jones. This article first appeared in <a rel="noopener" href="https://www.readersdigest.co.nz/kitchen-tips/10-cooking-tricks-that-are-only-taught-in-culinary-schools" target="_blank">Reader’s Digest</a>. Find more of what you love from the world’s best-loved magazine, <a rel="noopener" href="https://readersdigest.innovations.co.nz/c/readersdigestemailsubscribe?utm_source=over60&utm_medium=articles&utm_campaign=RDSUB&keycode=WRA93V" target="_blank">here’s our best subscription offer</a>.

Food & Wine

What my daughter taught me when she came out as trans

“I am a trans woman. I would like she/her pronouns and my name is Hannah.” This is the sentence my child blurted out to me over the phone three years ago. Despite its bluntness, the statement wasn’t callous or even ill-timed. Truth be told, I had forced the declaration. My child had called with something important to say and wanted to talk to my husband, Colin, and me at the same time, but Colin was away. Given that I possess a not-insignificant panic strain in my genetic makeup, I found myself, well, panicking. Was my child injured? Ill? Dying? I conjured the thin thread of authority I had over my then 25-year-old and said, “No, you have to tell me now!” “I would rather wait,” was the measured response. I could feel all the saliva I possessed leaving my body for damper pastures. I couldn’t have this matter hanging, so I pushed and pleaded, cajoled and begged. It was a shameless display – clearly, I wasn’t above that. After more back-and-forthing, out it came: “I am a trans woman. I would like she/her pronouns, and my name is Hannah.” I paused to take in the situation – or at least lie to myself that I was taking it in. Then, relentlessly upbeat, I exclaimed: “I’m so happy for you, very happy. You know that your father and I will support you 100 per cent, and it’s wonderful and I’m not super surprised and you are such a wonderful person and we really don’t care what you do with your life as long as – ” Dear God, I had to find a way to shut up. I was exhausting myself. I’m what I call an emotional first responder – when a loved one is sharing something difficult or complex, I put on my support cape and swoop in to distribute accolades and platitudes willy nilly. Breathe, I urged myself. Breathe. “So, um, why ‘Hannah’?” I heard myself ask. There it was. Apparently my takeaway from this huge moment in my child’s life was a name. “Hannah” seemed to be my issue. Shallow waters run deep. She responded to my question in a very calm manner. “You know how much I loved Cheryl’s dog.” “You are naming yourself after Hannah the dog? Really?” “I thought the name was soft and pretty, and I needed my name to be soft and pretty. Does that make sense?” Of course it made sense. My heart ached with shame. I was officially a bad person. Because it had been a few moments since I’d launched into a breakneck run-on sentence, I said, “Well, if you love the name Hannah, I love the name Hannah, and I am sure your father will love it, and I am so glad it makes you feel beautiful, because you are beautiful, inside and out, and I support this choice wholeheartedly, honey. It’s your life and you are old enough to make your own choices and – ” At this point I was desperately hoping someone would hand me a pill. Hannah stopped my runaway train of thought by cutting in: “Thanks. I love you so much and I knew you would support me. Why don’t I come over the day Dad gets home and we can have dinner and spend time talking?” “Of course, yes, um, Hannah. We can do that. That would be great. What a wonderful idea, um, Hannah.” Mercifully, she wrapped up the conversation with “great, love you, bye” and hung up before I could respond. I spent the next few hours pacing up and down the stairs of our home, our two terriers at my heels. As I attempted to sort out why I was upset, the dogs kept their gaze trained on me: Walk? Are we going for a walk? Walk?! After really analysing my reaction and my feelings, it came down to one thing. I was fine with my child’s transition. I wasn’t invested in her gender, just her humanity. But there was so much fear: fear for her safety, fear for how the world might treat her, fear for her heart. The two following nights were fraught with nightmares. I dreamed our son was lost. Our son was dead. We never had a son. I gave birth, but when I looked for my son, they told me at the hospital that I was mistaken and had simply had my appendix removed. Our son had joined a tiny-house cult and was never heard from again. Once I woke up, I was a zombie, the despair of those horrible dreams clinging to me like possessed dryer sheets. I had made peace with our child’s news and had no issues with the concept of her transition, but I was still mourning the loss of our son. I didn’t get a chance to say goodbye. She is a woman. As much as I thought I was prepared for that, I guess I wasn’t. I had to remind myself that this shouldn’t have been a huge shock. A few years before our daughter came out to us as trans, she had broken up with her girlfriend of four years. She told us she was bisexual and wanted to explore that. Then she began, as she put it, “experimenting with my feminine side.” After almost a year of seeing her integrate more traditionally feminine looks into her wardrobe, we became used to this new bi, fluid, femme, butch, male/female person. LGBTQ+ wasn’t all-encompassing enough. It’s like she was rocking the whole alphabet with her identity. And then she landed. The day after Hannah’s call, her dad came home. He was fine – no anxiety, no nightmares, just a loving parent in a relaxed state of acceptance. Show-off! As a result of my constant anxiety, I resembled an 80-year-old with dirty hair who had lived hard. Having no control over much else, I opted to shower. An all-around good choice. The following afternoon, we were in the kitchen making pasta primavera – our daughter’s favourite meal – as we waited for her to arrive. We were also spending the time diligently practicing pronouns. I was busy “she”-ing and “her”-ing it up with zeal, but every time I said “Hannah,” the name came out garbled, like I was drunk and wearing my night guard. At some point, we heard a key turn in the front door, and in she walked. To my elation, no one was lost or missing. They were all here in the hall: the hes, the shes and the thems, in one beautiful package. No one had left us. The same human we first met 25 years earlier was standing right in front of us. We all started to cry. Thank God it was all of us – I was tired of being the loopy one. We moved into our sunroom, wine in hand, to chat. The three of us talked all the talks there were to talk, and Colin and I asked all the questions we could think of. Over the course of an afternoon that can best be described as an acronym-o-rama, we listened and learned. We so wanted to respect and understand what she was going through. We could see that she was exploring, too, taking time to listen to her heart and her mind. At some point, the conversation moved into more familiar topics: her work and social life, Japanese films. It was as if nothing had changed. And nothing had, really. It had always been the three of us, our tight little unit, and today was no different. We ate her favourite meal and then our lovely daughter went home to her apartment. Since that day, we have sometimes slipped up on pronouns, and she has always patiently, gently corrected us. We’ve gone out in public, and people have been mostly supportive, but there have been looks. Stares. Our daughter says she’s often fine with that – people are just trying to figure her out. She’s a more generous soul than me. As time passed, I realised that I was somehow still stuck on the name. “Hannah” was lovely, yes, but not nearly unique or powerful enough for my girl. But I knew I had to let it go. Then, in a surprise turn of events, our daughter told us that many trans people come out using a name they don’t end up keeping. She said she had been thinking about it and she wanted a new name and would love for us to be part of that process. She asked us to pitch names from our Scottish and Irish backgrounds. I was elated and set to the task as soon as she was out of our sight. What a glorious privilege to get to help name her! I know it sounds silly, but it was like she was being born all over again. After copious research, Colin and I presented our daughter with 40 names. She decided on Kinley, from the Irish side. Kin for short. It fits her. It belongs to her. What is more difficult is figuring out how to move through the world such as it is. One day a year or so ago, Kinley and I were at a local fair. As we passed by a woman and her twenty something daughter, they shot a look of such hate and disgust that it left me breathless. The object of their ire was Kinley. The daughter, mouth agape, had exclaimed, “There’s a transvestite!” and the mother then wheeled around to spew, “Where is it?” “It.” She said “it.” I was gutted. The younger woman circled my daughter, looking her up and down. We were stunned, frozen in place. As she walked away, I stumbled over to her on legs suddenly made of rubber. Circling her the same way she had circled Kinley, I looked her up and down, then moved close to her face, uttered “uh-huh” and stalked away. In an attempt to recover, I said to Kinley, “This must make you so angry.” Her reply: “I can’t afford to be angry. I just get frightened.” Frightened for just living her life. Frightened for existing. I came home and, weeping, told Colin what had taken place. But after thinking about it, I realized that my reaction, although possibly warranted, was also aggressive. That didn’t sit well with me. So I had cards made up. If things got ugly again, I would hand out a simple statement, embellished on one side with a lovely pink flower, that reads: “My daughter is a trans woman. She is a loving and kind human being. Please join me in supporting her and every person who is trying to live their authentic life. Peace and love.” I remember the day the package arrived in the mail. Colin laughed as I opened the box of 250 cards. “Wow, you’re expecting trouble!” he told me. What can I say? There was a special if you ordered in bulk. I am happy to say that I have not handed out a single card. Instead, I get to focus on Kinley, my lovely, brave, poised, bright daughter. I have a daughter! There should be a newer, more powerful word for pride. As for our family, life as a trio continues as before, filled with old favourites, like watching movies, and new experiences, like buying bras. A little while ago, Kinley and I were out shopping for clothes. As we exited our separate cubicles in the change room, we realised, laughing, that we had tried on the exact same dress. I ended up buying one dress for me and treating Kinley to hers. At least that way I know she won’t be raiding my closet – because that’s what daughters do. Written by Debra McGrath. This article first appeared on <a href="https://www.readersdigest.co.nz/culture/what-my-daughter-taught-me-when-she-came-out-as-trans">Reader’s Digest</a>. For more of what you love from the world’s best-loved magazine, <a href="http://readersdigest.co.nz/subscribe">here’s our best subscription offer</a>.

Relationships

How one month at sea taught me to steal my life back from my phone

A survey this year revealed that Australians, on average, spend <a href="https://wearesocial.com/au/blog/2019/02/digital-report-australia">10.2 hours</a> a day with interactive digital technologies. And this figure goes up every year. This is time we don’t get back. And our analogue lives, which include everything not digital, shrink in direct proportion. I recently decided to spend four weeks at sea without access to my phone or the internet, and here’s what I learnt about myself, and the digital rat race I was caught in. Cold turkey Until a year or so ago, I was a 10.2 hours a day person. Over the years, dependence on technology and stress had destroyed any semblance of balance in my life – between work and home, or pleasure and obligation. I wanted to quit, or cut down, at least. Tech “detox” apps such as the time-limiting <a href="https://www.theverge.com/2018/9/17/17870126/ios-12-screen-time-app-limits-downtime-features-how-to-use">Screen Time</a> were useless. Even with these, I was still “on”, and just a click away from unblocking Instagram. So I thought: what about going cold turkey? No screen time at all, 24/7. Was that possible, and what would it feel like? My commute to work passed the Footscray docks, where container-ships come and go. Passing one day, I wondered if it was possible to go on one of those ships and travel from Melbourne to … somewhere? Turns out it was. You can book a cabin online and just go. And in what was probably an impulse, I went. For about four weeks I had no devices, as I sailed solo from <a href="http://www.cma-cgm.com/products-services/line-services/Flyer/AAXANL">West Melbourne to Singapore</a>. I wanted to experiment, to see what it felt like to take a digital detox, and whether I could change my habits when I returned home. What I learnt Cold turkey withdrawal is difficult. Even in prison, <a href="https://aic.gov.au/publications/tandi/tandi560">many inmates have access of some kind of device</a>. The time on that ship taught me there is a whole other side to life, the non-digital side, that gets pushed aside by the ubiquitous screen. Real life contains people, conversations, flesh and textures that are not glass or plastic. It also contains whole worlds that exist inside your head, and these can be summoned when we have the time, and devote a bit of effort to it. These are worlds of memory and imagination. Worlds of reflection and thought. Worlds you see differently to the pallid glare of a screen. I took four books with me and read them in a way I hadn’t before: slower, deeper and with more contemplation. The words were finite (and therefore precious). I’d never spent time like this in my whole life, and was inspired to write about it in <a href="https://grattanstreetpress.com/new-releases/">detail</a>. Of course, we all have our own commitments and can’t always do something like this. But away from the screen, I learned a lot about our digital world and about myself, and have tried to adapt these lessons to “normal” life. Since I’ve been back, it feels like some sense of balance has been restored. Part of this came from seeing the smartphone as a slightly alien thing (which it is). And instead of being something that always prompts me, I flipped the power dynamic around, to make it something I choose to use - and choose when to use. Meaning sometimes it’s OK to leave it at home, or switch it off. If you can persist with these little changes, you might find even when you have your phone in your pocket, you can go hours without thinking about it. Hours spent doing precious, finite, analogue things. How to get started You could begin by deleting most of your apps. You’ll be surprised by how many you won’t miss. Then, slowly flip the power dynamic between you and your device around. Put it in a drawer once a week - for a morning, then for a day - increasing this over time. If this sounds a bit like commercial digital detox self-care, then so be it. But this is minus the self-care gurus and websites. Forget those. No one (and no app) is really going to help you take back your agency. You need to do it yourself, or organise it with friends. Perhaps try seeing who can go the furthest. After a few weeks, you might reflect on how it feels: what’s the texture of the analogue world you got back? Because, more likely than not, you will get it back. For some, it might be a quieter and more subjective pre-digital world they half remember. For others, it might be something quite new, which maybe feels a bit like freedom.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important; text-shadow: none !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/127501/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/robert-hassan-197946">Robert Hassan</a>, Professor, School of Culture and Communication, <a href="http://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-melbourne-722">University of Melbourne</a> This article is republished from <a href="http://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/a-month-at-sea-with-no-technology-taught-me-how-to-steal-my-life-back-from-my-phone-127501">original article</a>.

Technology

"Racism is taught": Heartwarming video of toddlers hugging each other goes viral

A video of two toddlers running down the street to give each other a hug has gone viral, garnering headlines across the globe. The video, posted by Michael Cisneros to social media last week, shows his two-year-old son Maxwell running towards and hugging his best friend Finnegan after unexpectedly spotting him on the New York street. <iframe src="https://www.facebook.com/plugins/video.php?href=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.facebook.com%2FMichaelDCisnerosNYC%2Fvideos%2F10217659556234176%2F&show_text=0&width=476" width="476" height="476" style="border: none; overflow: hidden;" scrolling="no" frameborder="0" allowtransparency="true" allowfullscreen="true"></iframe> Cisneros told CBSN New York that the two boys hug every time they see each other. The father said the video has attracted thousands of views and shares online because of the growing racial tensions in the US and around the world. “Honestly, I think it has gotten so big because of the race issue in our country and also around the world,” Cisneros said. “Racism is taught. Hatred is taught. These two boys don’t see anything different within each other. They love each other for who they are and that’s exactly how it should be. “We just want to raise loving, caring boys, and I think the world likes to see a little bit of hope.” Cisneros said Maxwell and Finnegan first became friends when their parents met at a restaurant a year ago. He added that today the toddlers celebrate their birthdays together and are always “super excited to see each other, even if they’ve only been apart for a day or two”.

Caring

Nigella Lawson: "How my daughter taught me to be happy again"

Nigella Lawson is known by many as being a domestic goddess in the kitchen, but she credits her daughter for helping her transform her life after her ex-husband grabbed her by the throat. Charles Saatchi, advertising millionaire, shocked the world as he grabbed his then wife by the throat in public in a busy restaurant. Just seven weeks after the incident back in 2013, their 10-year marriage was over. <img style="width: 500px; height: 281.25px;" src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/7828843/nigella-lawson.jpg" alt="" data-udi="umb://media/8b57f00d49ae48ceab13b0a2e626367d" /> However, Nigella’s confidence was shaken, and she developed a fear of being photographed or being seen in public. Her daughter, Cosima Diamond, 25, is credited with helping Nigella overcome her fear. “I have been forced to be guarded. I used to be more open and I’d like to think I will be again,” Nigella opened up to <a rel="noopener" href="https://www.mirror.co.uk/tv/tv-news/nigella-lawson-says-daughter-transformed-18457049" target="_blank">The Mirror.</a> "Cosima said to me, ‘Mum, would you rather be a real person like you or someone who has hair and make-up done to go to the supermarket? It is better to be a real person.’ She’s right.” Nigella also shared that her children are the biggest fans of her cooking, but they make fun of her presenting style. “When I am on TV, I cook the food that I cook at home but my children always tease me. “I do a running commentary at home of my life like I do on TV. “I always wanted to do the advanced driving test as when you do it you have to do a commentary like, ‘I am now moving into second gear.’ I do feel I ought to take it.” Nigella says that she gets a “bit nervous or a bit awkward” due to the camera being on her. “The thing about television is that it is both frightening and boring. "It is not an act, but I do think you get a bit nervous or a bit awkward when there is a camera on you,” she explained. <blockquote style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" class="instagram-media" data-instgrm-captioned="" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/BxKJoVMlHCA/" data-instgrm-version="12"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"></div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"></div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"></div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"></div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"></div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <a style="color: #000; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none; word-wrap: break-word;" rel="noopener" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/BxKJoVMlHCA/" target="_blank">We're delighted to welcome goddess of the kitchen, Nigella Lawson, to the Masterchef kitchen next week! 👩🍳 🥘 🥗 ❤ #MasterChefAU</a> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">A post shared by <a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px;" rel="noopener" href="https://www.instagram.com/masterchefau/" target="_blank"> MasterChef Australia</a> (@masterchefau) on May 7, 2019 at 3:51am PDT </div> </blockquote> Nigella went into detail about her success in Australia, following her appearances on the Australian version of MasterChef. “I do like it as I like the people there. The programme has been going for 11 years,” she said. “They are very funny, Australians. I don’t go to America a great deal. I did for book tours, but America is a very greedy monster. “All they ever want to know is, ‘What are you going to do next?’ and ‘How much more are you going to do?’ Nigella says that the pressure isn’t something that she wants for her life. “It is not what I want to do. If I wanted to go and work non-stop and do that I would go there. "I like lying about and reading books and drinking tea as well, so I don’t want a life which just becomes about making television programmes.”

Mind

"Super-recognisers" accurately pick out a face in a crowd – but can this skill be taught?

Yenny is 26 years old, lives in Melbourne, and has a very specific talent. One day, she was driving her car when she recognised a man who had been several years below her at high school and whom she hadn’t seen for more than ten years. What makes this particularly impressive is that she recognised him from the briefest glimpse in her rear-view mirror while he was driving the car behind hers. Yenny recounts many such amazing feats of recognition and is one of a very small proportion of the population known as “super-recognisers”. She was the top performer on a <a href="https://facetest.psy.unsw.edu.au/">national test of face recognition abilities</a> in Australia, coming first out of 20,000 participants. Could you learn to spot a face as well as Yenny? Well … maybe. Our <a href="https://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0211037">new research</a> shows that many training courses offered in this field of expertise are ineffective in improving people’s accuracy in face identification. But other ways of learning how to identify faces may work; we’re just not yet sure exactly how. In-demand expertise <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3904192/">Super-recognisers</a> are used by police and security agencies to spot targets in crowded train stations, monitor surveillance footage, and track people of interest. During the 2011 London riots, for example, super-recognisers from the Metropolitan Police <a href="http://www.bbc.com/future/story/20150611-the-superpower-police-now-use-to-tackle-crime">identified more than 600 people</a> from very poor-quality surveillance footage – a task that not even the best facial recognition software can perform reliably. So can anyone become a super-recogniser? Can you make up for a lack of superpowers through training? In our <a href="https://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0211037">paper</a> we assessed the effectiveness of training courses given to practitioners who make facial identification decisions for a living. We reviewed 11 training courses that comply with international training standards from Australia, UK, US and Finland. We found that training courses typically teach facial anatomy – focusing on the muscles, bones and shape of the face – and instruct trainees to inspect faces feature by feature. Novices and genuine trainees completed one of four training courses and we tracked their identification accuracy from before to after training. Surprisingly, we found the training courses had almost no effect on people’s accuracy. This was especially surprising to the people who took the training – an astonishing 93% of trainees thought the training had improved their ability to identify faces. Our research shows that even the world’s best available training – used to train police, border control agents, forensic scientists and other security personnel – does not compensate for talent in face recognition. This is consistent with recent research suggesting that our face identification abilities are largely predetermined by <a href="https://www.pnas.org/content/107/11/5238.long">genetics</a>. Forensic facial examiners This may come as disappointing news to people who hope to become a super-recogniser. But all is not lost. Scientists have recently discovered that some specialist groups of practitioners show very high levels of accuracy. Forensic facial examiners routinely compare images of faces to turn CCTV images into informative face identification evidence in criminal trials. Recent work shows that they too outperform novices in very <a href="https://www.pnas.org/content/115/24/6171">challenging tests</a>. Forensic facial examiners present a paradox for scientists. They perform face identification tasks with a high degree of accuracy, and this ability appears to be acquired through professional experience and training. <a href="https://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0211037">Our study</a> suggests there is no benefit of face identification training courses when tested immediately before and after. In addition, <a href="https://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0103510">previous work</a> has suggested that merely performing face-matching tasks in daily work is not sufficient to improve accuracy. Some passport officers have been working for 20 years and perform no better than others who have been working for just a few months. This paradox suggests there is something particular about the type of training and professional experience that forensic facial examiners receive that enables them to develop visual expertise in identifying faces, and which isn’t provided by standard training courses. How do they do it? In our current research we are working closely with government agencies to uncover the basis of forensic facial examiners’ expertise. For example, we now know that part of their expertise comes from using a very particular <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/28045276">comparison strategy</a>, where they break the face down into individual facial features and then slowly and systematically assess the similarity of each feature in turn. Interestingly, the nature of this expertise appears to be qualitatively different to that of super-recognisers – Yenny recognised her old classmate using a quick, intuitive process as she glanced in the rear-view mirror. However, these snap judgements made by super-recognisers may not be suitable for the type of identification evidence that forensic facial examiners give in court, where a careful analysis of facial images is necessary to support identification decisions. Importantly, forensic facial examiners provide detailed reports of the observations used to support their decisions, which can then be cross-examined in court. Trainable vs hardwired Super-recognisers and forensic facial examiners use distinct routes to high performance in face identification. Effective training appears to target the slower, deliberate and analytical visual processing that characterises forensic facial examiners. The faster and more intuitive skill that enabled Yenny to recognise faces of relative strangers in her rear-view mirror is likely to be untrainable, and hard-wired. This raises the question of how to balance these different sources of expertise. It may be that super-recognisers are best suited to surveillance-type roles, such as monitoring CCTV or searching for targets in large crowds. Forensic facial examiners may be better suited to providing identification evidence to the court, which requires thorough explanations of how and why the expert came to their decision. Alternatively, it may be possible to train super-recognisers in the expert skills characterising forensic facial examination, or to form teams that include both types of expert. The aim of our work is to integrate these sources of human expertise with the latest face recognition software to improve the accuracy of face identification evidence. Such a system can make society safer, but also fairer, by reducing the likelihood of wrongful convictions. Can you beat Yenny’s high score of 88% on the super-recogniser test? Find out <a href="https://facetest.psy.unsw.edu.au/">here</a>. Written by Alice Towler and David White. Republished with permission from <a href="https://theconversation.com/super-recognisers-accurately-pick-out-a-face-in-a-crowd-but-can-this-skill-be-taught-112003">The Conversation.</a>

Technology

6 life lessons my grandparents taught me

Last week, on Grandparent’s Day, we asked you, the Over60 community, to share the life lessons they were taught by their grandparents and which ones they’re passing on to their own grandchildren. Your responses blew us away! Here are six of our favourites. 1. The importance of unconditional love “I learnt love from my grandmother. Not huggy sentimental love, but the love that’s shown by being there, always being available and welcoming and being my backup person for my whole childhood.” – Sandy Bishop. 2. Hands-on skills “As a grandma l am just there... the rock behind the scenes offering space to be themselves and passing on sewing, cooking, painting, crafting skills for them to use in this electronic world where basic skills seem to be forgotten sometimes… and being teenagers they need that space to chill! Isn't it such an amazing reward to watch and be involved in this generation evolution?” – Judy Anderson. 3. Integrity and baking “My grandma taught me integrity, she said you can lose everything in life but without your integrity you have truly have nothing. She also taught me how to bake. When I suddenly get the urge to bake at some ridiculous hour of the night, which happens, I feel she is still around and having a chuckle with me.” – Ishca Anna Graham. 4. The simple things “As a grandparent myself... I will show my littles ones, love, laughter, books and board games, nature kindness and love for animals, lots of arts and crafts, walks along the beach finding shells, and never-ending patience and unconditional love.” – Nikki Munday. 5. Time is precious “My grandmother died when I was nine. I learned from her that the time spent with grandchildren is like gold. I always felt I was the most important person when I was with her, and I hope my grandchildren feel the same about the time they spend with me.” – Robyn Marconi. 6. The value of family “All of my grandparents taught me the value of family. We had wonderful Christmas dinners with family, where everyone came together and we all knew each other. My maternal grandmother taught me bush medicine, while my paternal grandmother taught me how to make wool and wire shamrocks and butterflies and how to be frugal, without being mean. Of course, they always gave heaps of love, all. I love them all too.” – Beverley Speight Mottrom. What did you learn from your grandparents? Are you passing those lessons on to your own grandchildren? Let us know in the comments!

Family & Pets

7 important lessons Enid Blyton taught us

Enid Blyton. Like all the greatest children’s book authors – Dahl, Seuss, Rowling – you only need to say her name to conjure up fantastic, vivid imagery, and can easily dive into a discussion with just about anyone over which series is the best (personally, I preferred her magical worlds of The Magic Faraway Tree, The Wishing Chair, and Noddy but I also loved The Naughtiest Girl). Ms Blyton’s writing is a childhood touchstone for so many of us, and as with all good children’s culture, it taught without being prescriptive or boring – you probably didn’t even notice that you were learning as you read. In which case, let’s take a look back at some of the things Enid Blyton taught us through her writing. 1. Teamwork makes the dream work There are very few, if any, Blyton stories that don’t lean heavily on the positive power of working together with friends or siblings. Every time there was a crisis to handle, or a mystery to solve, a band of Blyton’s best were there, working together to save the day. 2. Friendships aren’t always immediate Some of Blyton’s merry groups of friends appeared fully formed and ready for adventure, but occasional newcomers would appear from time to time, and show us that friendships don’t always happen right away, but if you give someone a chance, they could become a wonderful addition to your life, so don’t rush to make judgements. Defining quote: “’You simply never know about people,’ thought Elizabeth. ‘You think because they are timid they’ll always be timid, or because they’re mean they’ll always be mean. But they can change awfully quickly if they are treated right.’” 3. Put your mind to it, and you can overcome anything With the dizzying range of stories Blyton wove, her characters were in such diverse situations, but were always able to keep their chins firmly up and remain positive about their circumstances. Defining quote:“The best way to treat obstacles is to use them as stepping-stones. Laugh at them, tread on them, and let them lead you to something better.” 4. You can’t run away from your problems Blyton’s characters never dreamed of running away from life’s challenges – not even when they were scared. Defining quote:“You’re trying to escape from your difficulties, and there never is any escaping from your difficulties, never. They have to be faced and fought.” 5. Allow yourself to grow and learn With wisdom that many politicians could do with, Blyton showed that being persuaded to another way of thinking is not a bad thing, and should not be a source of shame or damaged pride. Defining quote: “Make up your mind about things, by all means – but if something happens to show you that you are wrong, then it is feeble not to change your mind, Elizabeth. Only the strongest people have the pluck to change their minds, and say so, if they see they have been wrong in their ideas.” 6. The world isn’t always fair to children Unfortunately, Blyton’s characters experienced their fair share of nastiness, but those incredibly patient children knew how to handle themselves (and the adults) to make sure all was put right in the end. Defining quote: “It wasn’t a bit of good fighting grown-ups. They could do exactly as they liked.” 7. Picnics are the best meals Blyton’s characters are forever having picnic lunches in the great outdoors. Baskets are packed with loaves of bread, bottles of ginger ale, and wedges of cheese, and these simple foods always sound so tasty and luxurious when enjoyed in the great outdoors, that it inspires readers to try it themselves. Defining quote: “’I don’t know why, but the meals we have on picnics always taste so much nicer than the ones we have indoors,’ said George.” Which is your favourite Enid Blyton book/series? Tell us in the comments below.

Books

8 beauty lessons my mother taught me

When it comes to beauty and make-up, there’s no “right” way to do it. We all have different skincare routines, different product preferences and different looks we aspire to. But no matter how varied our methods might be, there are always a few tricks that everyone seems to follow and pass on to the next generation. Last month, we asked the Over60 community to share the beauty tricks they swear by, and we loved your answers. 1. Never stop at the jawline “Mum told me, maybe my sisters too, that when I got to the age of wearing make-up, not to leave it at the jawline. Smooth it under the chin so as to look as though you're not wearing any. I still do this when I have to wear makeup.” – Jean Clawson. 2. Don’t frown “Don't frown. Put a piece of sticky tape vertically on your forehead and you’ll feel the tape wrinkle up every time you frown. Most people don't realise how much they do it.” – Valerie Baxter. 3. Wash your face before bed “Never, ever go to bed without washing your face and only pat it dry before applying moisturiser – never rub!” – Marilyn Mankin Gallagher. 4. Ditch the cigarettes “Don't smoke. No amount of moisturiser or drinks of water will take away the wrinkles caused by smoking.” – Mary Hull. 5. Keep it simple and natural “To wash my face with soap and warm water then rinse with cold water. She always used olive oil as a moisturiser and I use my own natural skin care products to this day. People freak out when I tell them I'm 65 years old! My mother was right, although I do also use an exfoliating brush every day.” – Jannette Naiken. 6. Invest in a silk pillowcase “Definitely sleep on a pure silk pillowcase. It’s great for the skin and your hair isn't so messed up in morning.” – Rina Bonner. 7. Cut back on the mascara “As you get older, apply mascara on the top eyelashes only. This works for me!” – Janine O’Callaghan. 8. Three rules “Keep your face out of the sun, don’t wear too much makeup and always wear the right colour foundation.” – Valerie Keily. What beauty tips did your mother, grandmothers and aunts pass down to you? Share them with us in the comments below!

Beauty & Style

The grammar rules you were taught at school that are wrong

Misty Adoniou is an Associate Professor in Language, Literacy and TESL at the University of Canberra. Do you remember being taught you should never start your sentences with “And” or “But”? What if I told you that your teachers were wrong and there are lots of other so-called grammar rules that we’ve probably been getting wrong in our English classrooms for years? How did grammar rules come about? To understand why we’ve been getting it wrong, we need to know a little about the history of grammar teaching. Grammar is how we organise our sentences in order to communicate meaning to others. Those who say there is one correct way to organise a sentence are <a href="https://ore.exeter.ac.uk/repository/bitstream/handle/10036/4481/2012GrammarforWritingReadingWriting.pdf?sequence=5" target="_blank">called prescriptivists</a>. Prescriptivist grammarians prescribe how sentences must be structured. Prescriptivists had their day in the sun in the 18th century. As books became more accessible to the everyday person, prescriptivists wrote the first grammar books to tell everyone how they must write. These self-appointed guardians of the language just made up grammar rules for English, and put them in books that they sold. It was a way of ensuring that literacy stayed out of reach of the working classes. They took their newly concocted rules from Latin. This was, presumably, to keep literate English out of reach of anyone who wasn’t rich or posh enough to attend a grammar school, which was a school where you were taught Latin. And yes, that is the origin of today’s grammar schools. The other camp of grammarians are the descriptivists. They write grammar guides that describe how English is used by different people, and for different purposes. They recognise that language isn’t static, and it isn’t one-size-fits-all. 1. You can’t start a sentence with a conjunction Let’s start with the grammatical sin I have already committed in this article. You can’t start a sentence with a conjunction. Obviously you can, because I did. And I expect I will do it again before the end of this article. There, I knew I would! Those who say it is always incorrect to start a sentence with a conjunction, like “and” or “but”, sit in the prescriptivist camp. However, <a href="https://ore.exeter.ac.uk/repository/bitstream/handle/10036/4481/2012GrammarforWritingReadingWriting.pdf?sequence=5" target="_blank">according to the descriptivists</a>, at this point in our linguistic history, it is fine to start a sentence with a conjunction in an op-ed article like this, or in a novel or a poem. It is less acceptable to start a sentence with a conjunction in an academic journal article, or in an essay for my son’s high school economics teacher, as it turns out. But times are changing. 2. You can’t end a sentence with a preposition Well, in Latin you can’t. In English you can, and we do all the time. Admittedly a lot of the younger generation don’t even know what a preposition is, so this rule is already obsolete. But let’s have a look at it anyway, for old time’s sake. According to this rule, it is wrong to say “Who did you go to the movies with?” Instead, the prescriptivists would have me say “With whom did you go to the movies?” I’m saving that structure for when I’m making polite chat with the Queen on my next visit to the palace. That’s not a sarcastic comment, just a fanciful one. I’m glad I know how to structure my sentences for different audiences. It is a powerful tool. It means I usually feel comfortable in whatever social circumstances I find myself in, and I can change my writing style according to purpose and audience. That is why <a href="https://theconversation.com/grammar-matters-and-should-be-taught-differently-25604" target="_blank">we should teach grammar in schools</a>. We need to give our children a full repertoire of language so that they can make grammatical choices that will allow them to speak and write for a wide range of audiences. 3. Put a comma when you need to take a breath It’s a novel idea, synchronising your writing with your breathing, but the two have nothing to do with one another and if this is the instruction we give our children, it is little wonder commas are so poorly used. <a href="http://www.theatlantic.com/notes/2016/06/who-really-cares-about-the-oxford-comma/487475/" target="_blank">Punctuation is a minefield</a> and I don’t want to risk blowing up the internet. So here is a basic description of what commas do, and <a href="http://www.thepunctuationguide.com/index.html" target="_blank">read this</a> for a more comprehensive guide. Commas provide demarcation between like grammatical structures. When adjectives, nouns, phrases or clauses are butting up against each other in a sentence, we separate them with a comma. That’s why I put commas between the three nouns and the two clauses in that last sentence. Commas also provide demarcation for words, phrases or clauses that are embedded in a sentence for effect. The sentence would still be a sentence even if we took those words away. See, for example, the use of commas in this sentence. 4. To make your writing more descriptive, use more adjectives American writer <a href="http://www.forbes.com/sites/katelee/2012/11/30/mark-twain-on-writing-kill-your-adjectives/#745e5078637b" target="_blank">Mark Twain had it right</a>. “When you catch an adjective, kill it. No, I don’t mean utterly, but kill most of them - then the rest will be valuable.” If you want your writing to be more descriptive, play with your sentence structure. Consider this sentence from Liz Lofthouse’s beautiful children’s book <a href="https://penguin.com.au/books/ziba-came-on-a-boat-9780143505518" target="_blank">Ziba came on a boat</a>. It comes at a key turning point in the book, the story of a refugee’s escape. “Clutching her mother’s hand, Ziba ran on and on, through the night, far away from the madness until there was only darkness and quiet.” A beautifully descriptive sentence, and not an adjective in sight. 5. Adverbs are the words that end in ‘ly’ Lots of adverbs end in “ly”, but lots don’t. Adverbs give more information about verbs. They tell us when, where, how and why the verb happened. So that means words like “tomorrow”, “there” and “deep” can be adverbs. I say they can be adverbs because, actually, a word is just a word. It becomes an adverb, or a noun, or an adjective, or a verb when it is doing that job in a sentence. Deep into the night, and the word deep is an adverb. Down a deep, dark hole and it is an adjective. When I dive into the deep, it is doing the work of a noun. Time to take those word lists of adjectives, verbs and nouns off the classroom walls. Time, also, to ditch those old Englishmen who wrote a grammar for their times, not ours. If you want to understand what our language can do and how to use it well, read widely, think deeply and listen carefully. And remember, neither time nor language stands still – for any of us. Written by Misty Adoniou. First appeared on <a href="https://theconversation.com/" target="_blank">The Conversation</a>.<img width="1" height="1" src="https://counter.theconversation.edu.au/content/70327/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-advanced" alt="The Conversation"/>

Books

Thank you dad for everything you taught me

Anne Marr, 68, is a registered hairdresser, whose hobbies include writing, gardening, caring for wild life and learning. She’s also studied health, journalism and pain management. Well it’s Father’s Day again and I suppose I’m like many and rather missing their dad. I was really rather blessed as Dad lived with me for the last seven months of his life and they were probably the best seven months we got to spend together. We talked a great deal about things we had never talked about before. We also discussed his passing and what he would like done when the time came. When he did pass over we had the added blessing of my daughter and I being beside him, holding his hand, and his grandson sitting on the bed with him. The dog was there as well. Dad loved dogs and always had one. It was a peaceful passing at 11.15am at home with us all. As a child and teenager I don’t think I appreciated how much he sacrificed for us, or valued, like I do now as an adult and parent, the wonderful morals he instilled in us. I try my best to live up to those values and morals and carry on his traditions that he stuck to all his life. These were: <ul> <li>Do unto others as you would have done unto you.</li> <li>Respect nature.</li> <li>Do or learn something new at least once every year of your life, even if life is busy and it’s only a small new thing. He believed we should learn every day of our life until we pass from this world.</li> </ul> So Dad, yes every year I am learning something new, but oh boy, modern technology moves so fast it’s hard to keep up with that! But I’m trying. Dad loved gardening and growing his own food. That he was so good at. He also believed that children should eventually learn more and be smarter than their parents. In the end I discovered he was right. Life goes in a full circle. It was meant to be this way. Dad and I had a special connection. We were both born on the same day, Friday February 13. That does not occur every year either. As far as we were concerned Friday the 13th is a lucky day. We both got to be born on this wonderful planet. So Happy Father’s Day, Dad! I bet where ever you are, you are keeping busy. Related links: <a href="/lifestyle/family-pets/2014/09/special-fathers-day-stories/">Special Father's Day stories from 2014 </a> <a href="/lifestyle/family-pets/2014/10/the-granddad-diaries-the-maths-police/">The Granddad diaries: the maths police</a> <a href="/news/news/2015/09/comics-of-father-and-son-relationship/">Comics perfectly illustrate the father-son relationship</a>

Family & Pets

13 cleaning secrets your mother taught you

Our mothers had more household chores to do with fewer cleaning products and tools, but managed to keep the house impeccable with some good old-fashioned elbow grease and a large dose of common sense. We asked you, the Over60 community, to share the cleaning remedies you learnt from your mother. Here are your tried-and-true ways to keep your home clean and tidy that still work wonders today. <ol> <li>“My mother was a great cook. She always filled the sink with warm, soapy water and washed up as she cooked. We always sat down with no dishes to wash, just the plates we were eating from and each washed their own.” – Mairee Patricia Robertson</li> <li>“If running late with having dinner prepared, especially with kids, put the tablecloth on with plates. The other half thinks dinners nearly ready. Also, clean copper with lemon and salt.” – Anne Tobin</li> <li>“I don't like using chemicals for cleaning. To clean the shower and bathroom use half and half of vinegar and dishwashing liquid.” – Helen Mitchell</li> <li>“Each morning make your beds and do your dishes before you can open your door to anyone.” – Mairee Patricia Robertson</li> <li>"Put washing soda in with washing keeps cloths soft. It’s also good for keeping your machine clean.” – Elizabeth Granter</li> <li>“After gardening, wash hands in over-ripe tomato, rinse under cold water and then squeeze half a lemon and a level teaspoon of sugar into palm of your hand. Gently massage into hands. Now you have clean and soft hands. Mum always did this after gardening.” – Susan Smith</li> <li>“I use vinegar to clean almost anything: kettle, windows, mirrors and I’ll even add salt to vinegar to make poison to spray onto weeds.” – Natalie George</li> <li>“My mum always said, ‘Never leave a room without checking if there is something you can take with you to put away in the room you are going to.’ I still practice this to this day.” – Lynne Mullaney</li> <li>“If you burn a pot or casserole dish, fill with boiling water and 2 tablespoons of Nappy San. Wait for the water to go cold and tip down the sink. Do the same with dirty oven shelves in laundry trough.” – Kay Chilton</li> <li>“Window cleaner is great for spot cleaning carpet.” – Penny Hoffman</li> <li>“I’ve been using white vinegar to stop clothes from ‘bleeding’ for decades. Recently when my visiting daughter put her laundry out and told me to be careful with a pair of purple cotton ‘Indian’ pants as they ran, I dunked them in a bucket of cold water with 1/2 cup of white vinegar, let them dry than washed them. Not a problem. Rinsing new towels in white vinegar will make them absorbent.” – Anne Mitchell</li> <li>“To clean the microwave, I put lemon juice in a bowl of water and microwave for a few minutes.” – Caroline Schmidt</li> <li>“I haven't ironed my clothes for years – just fold them carefully from the clothes line and no wrinkles.” – Margi Stapleton</li> </ol> Related links: <a href="/lifestyle/home-garden/2016/04/household-cleaners-hiding-in-your-pantry/">5 household cleaners hiding in your pantry</a> <a href="/lifestyle/home-garden/2015/09/common-cleaning-myths/">5 common cleaning myths busted</a> <a href="/lifestyle/at-home/2015/09/hidden-uses-for-household-items/">13 hidden uses for household items</a>

Home & Garden

Life lessons my 96-year-old mother inadvertently taught me

Robyn Lee is in her 70s and lives with two lovable but naughty cats. She has published a book on seniors behaving badly, entitled“Old Age and Villainy”, and considers herself an expert on the subject. Like most of us, born in the 40s and 50s, I was brought up to mind my manners, tell the truth and to respect my elders. As kids do, however, I noted the difference in what I was taught and what my elders practiced! Here are some examples of what I learnt: 1. How to disguise new outfits as old-ish Whenever mum bought herself a new outfit, she'd hide it at the back of the wardrobe for a few weeks. Once it was decided to bring the outfit out for an airing, if my father commented that he hadn't seen it before, she'd airily say she'd had it for a while. Which she had, I suppose. I was always sworn to secrecy on our shopping jaunts, not that father would have begrudged her the outfit, but I think mum always felt a little guilty, as she usually made her own clothes. 2. How to use wine as medication Mum suffers from badly shaking hands, the result of a neck injury in a car accident some 30-odd years earlier. As you can imagine, this makes life a little difficult for her at times. However, one evening she noticed that having a glass of wine controlled the shaking remarkably well. In one of our phone calls, she told me of this phenomenon adding that, according to an article she had read, scientists in the UK are conducting research into how wine could control essential tremor, as it's known. That was all I needed to hear. I don't have shaky hands but I'll drink wine for medicinal purposes... any purpose will do! 3. How not to tell a joke Mum loved to hear good jokes, yes, even the mildly naughty ones. She got a great kick out of it and loved to pass them on. Except she couldn't. She'd give an enthusiastic announcement about a wonderful joke she heard and proceed to tell it... punchline first. 4. When not to book a doctor's appointment Years ago, my parents owned a smallish property with two enormous glasshouses for growing tomatoes and beans during winter. There was also a small shop where they would sell produce on behalf of other small growers in the area. Mum loved eating vegetables and hated waste so anything that wasn't deemed good enough to sell was put aside and she'd cook and freeze it for the family. She adored beetroot and had made a beetroot salad for lunch one day, plus she had a large amount of sliced beetroot with her dinner that evening. She noticed something amiss the next day and made an appointment to see the doctor... until she realised what had caused the complaint. Mum had eaten so much beetroot her urine had turned red! Appointment hurriedly cancelled. 5. How to get a “discount” on plants Green thumbs ran in the family and Mum was no exception. Very rarely did she suffer defeat in that regard but when she did, she mourned the plant that had “turned up its toes”, as she would say. Some of her methods for obtaining cuttings were questionable though. On a walk with her one day, we admired gardens and various gorgeous plants and shrubs with mum oohing and aahing over different specimens. When we arrived back home, she gleefully showed off her “loot” to father. I was astounded. From the pockets of the jacket she had insisted on wearing even though it was a mild day, she pulled a whole bunch of what looked like leaves and small twigs. They were tiny pieces of plants she'd managed to pilfer while on our walk – and I hadn't noticed a thing! It goes without saying that her ill-gotten gains flourished under her tender care. 6. How to state the obvious On one occasion, my mother and her sister, plus me, my brothers and our cousins, nine kids in all, were at the beach. Being of Maori descent, we loved collecting pipis to steam over a fire for a delicious feast. However, fires on the beach were only permitted to Maori in those days and when a man came over to ask what we were doing, mum was a little nervous that he was a ranger, even though we weren't breaking any law. She gave her name and that of my auntie, saying, “This is my sister. We're related, you know.” It turned out the man wasn't a ranger but a visitor to the country, curious as to local custom. 7. The value of a good laugh Mum has the wonderful ability to get her words mixed at times with hilarious, if sometimes profane, results. I was telling her how I'd cut down on consuming meat, cutting out red meat altogether. "Ooh, I love meat," declared Mum, "I'm a real cannibal!" She meant carnivore. I had told Mum I was writing this article and she was a little dubious about the whole exercise. "You won't use my name, will you?" she asked anxiously. Upon my assurance that I wouldn't, she happily exclaimed, "Oh, that means I'll be anonymously famous!" What life lessons have you learnt from your mother? Share your experience with us in the comments below. If you have a story to share please get in touch with <a href="mailto:melody@oversixty.com.au">melody@oversixty.com.au</a> Related links: <a href="http://www.oversixty.co.nz/lifestyle/family-pets/2016/05/tips-to-help-shy-grandchildren-to-become-more-confident/">5 ways to help shy grandchildren to become more confident</a> <a href="http://www.oversixty.co.nz/lifestyle/family-pets/2016/05/secret-to-mindful-children-banning-bedroom/">The secret to raising mindful children</a> <a href="http://www.oversixty.co.nz/lifestyle/family-pets/2016/04/important-things-to-let-little-children-do/">7 important things little children should be allowed to do</a>

Family & Pets

Over 60

News

Shop

Catalogues

Travel

Health

Lifestyle

Finance

Entertainment

Property

Information

Keep up to date

Search

Should Taylor Swift be taught alongside Shakespeare? A professor of literature says yes

14 personal finance tips you were never taught – but need to know

More personal finance tips you were never taught

5 personal finance tips you were never taught – but need to know

Self-taught 14-year-old artist offered thousands for paintings

10 cooking tricks that are only taught in culinary schools

What my daughter taught me when she came out as trans

How one month at sea taught me to steal my life back from my phone

"Racism is taught": Heartwarming video of toddlers hugging each other goes viral

Nigella Lawson: "How my daughter taught me to be happy again"

"Super-recognisers" accurately pick out a face in a crowd – but can this skill be taught?

6 life lessons my grandparents taught me

7 important lessons Enid Blyton taught us

8 beauty lessons my mother taught me

The grammar rules you were taught at school that are wrong

Thank you dad for everything you taught me

13 cleaning secrets your mother taught you

Life lessons my 96-year-old mother inadvertently taught me

News

Shop

Catalogues

Travel

Health

Lifestyle

Finance

Entertainment

Property

Information

Keep up to date

Search

Should Taylor Swift be taught alongside Shakespeare? A professor of literature says yes

14 personal finance tips you were never taught – but need to know

More personal finance tips you were never taught

5 personal finance tips you were never taught – but need to know

Self-taught 14-year-old artist offered thousands for paintings

10 cooking tricks that are only taught in culinary schools

What my daughter taught me when she came out as trans

How one month at sea taught me to steal my life back from my phone

"Racism is taught": Heartwarming video of toddlers hugging each other goes viral

Nigella Lawson: "How my daughter taught me to be happy again"

"Super-recognisers" accurately pick out a face in a crowd – but can this skill be taught?

6 life lessons my grandparents taught me

7 important lessons Enid Blyton taught us

8 beauty lessons my mother taught me

The grammar rules you were taught at school that are wrong

Thank you dad for everything you taught me

13 cleaning secrets your mother taught you

Life lessons my 96-year-old mother inadvertently taught me

Join Over60