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Independent you: preventing, and recovering from, elder abuse

<p>From implementing safeguards to stop it from beginning to taking back control if it does, there is a lot of power in your hands to avoid elder abuse. </p> <p>Previously, we explored the warning signs of elder abuse and how <a href="https://www.oversixty.com.au/finance/retirement-income/are-you-a-victim-of-elder-abuse-without-even-realising-it">it is possible to be a victim without even realising it</a>.</p> <p>And with more wealth owned by people over 60 now than ever before, the potential for abuse only continues to grow.</p> <p>So, how can you prevent elder abuse happening to you? And if you are already experiencing it, what can you do to regain control over your finances, independence and wellbeing? </p> <p><strong>Prevention better than cure</strong></p> <p>The best way to avoid the impacts of elder abuse is to protect yourself against it beginning in the first place.</p> <p>Awareness is the first step, so having <a href="https://www.oversixty.com.au/finance/retirement-income/are-you-a-victim-of-elder-abuse-without-even-realising-it">read this article and knowing the warning signs</a>, you’re already ahead of the game!</p> <p>Other preventative actions include:</p> <ul> <li>Maintaining contact: social interactions are important not just for warding off loneliness but providing access to other points of view and avenues for support. </li> <li>External advisers: engage your own advisers – don’t simply employ who someone tells you to. They should be an impartial, qualified set of eyes to monitor things for you and point out anything that doesn’t seem right. This includes a financial advisor, lawyer, accountant, doctor and so on. A support person attending appointments with you may give you extra assurance.</li> <li>Power of attorney/guardianship: nominate multiple people, so that no one individual has all the say. It can be useful to include someone who is not a relative for impartiality, such as a trusted friend or your lawyer. </li> <li>Superannuation beneficiaries: super is separate from your will, but beneficiary nominations can only be spouse, child, dependent or interdependent otherwise it will go to you Will.  In your Will you can direct to other people or charities. Some beneficiaries lapse, so will need to be renewed.</li> <li>Wills: review your will to ensure it reflects YOUR wishes, not someone else’s. People can jostle over not only their own inheritance but may try to influence you to leave others out. </li> <li>Documenting everything: keep a written record, especially where money is concerned – such as acting as Bank of Mum and Dad for adult kids to purchase property. Outline how much is given, what if any interest/repayments are expected and when, and what happens if their relationship subsequently breaks down.</li> <li>Encouraging independence: people who have come to expect handouts can become abusive if those handouts stop or requests for more are denied. Support and encourage others, especially your kids, to be financially independent and self-sufficient.</li> </ul> <p><strong>Taking back control</strong></p> <p>Sadly, prevention is no longer an option for an <a href="https://www.aihw.gov.au/family-domestic-and-sexual-violence/population-groups/older-people?xd_co_f=YjAzZDU4YTUtYzA5YS00YTNkLWJkNDQtNjdiZTM5ZmY5ZjQx#abuse">estimated 598,000 Australians</a> already experiencing elder abuse. However, it is still possible to break the cycle.</p> <p>Don’t be embarrassed or stick your head in the sand hoping things will improve. You have done nothing wrong. You are entitled to enjoy your retirement years.</p> <p>To take back control over your affairs, your wellbeing and your independence:</p> <ul> <li>Ensure your physical safety first and foremost.</li> <li>Seek medical attention for your physical and mental health (the latter is crucial for making good decisions around the other points on this list).</li> <li>Get support from another relative, close friend, neighbour, or other trusted person. Don’t be alone.</li> <li>Secure a roof over your head. Having a stable place to live gives you the security and focus to tackle other concerns.</li> <li>Freeze access to your money – bank accounts, credit cards etc. This will stop (further) unauthorised withdrawals or purchases being charged to you.</li> <li>Seek professional advice. Your financial adviser, tax accountant and lawyer will be able to guide you through protecting your home, money, guardianship and estate planning matters.</li> <li>Make informed changes. Don’t do anything rashly – make necessary changes once you have sought independent advice and considered your options. This may involve making changes to your power of attorney, will, superannuation, bank accounts, even your phone number in extreme cases.</li> <li>Consider counselling. Your abuser may not realise the severity of their actions. An independent counsellor may be able to help them see this and change their ways, and ultimately salvage your relationship.</li> </ul> <p>If you or someone you know is experiencing elder abuse, seek help straight away. Speak to a trusted relative or friend. Seek independent legal and financial advice about your affairs. Or call the government’s free elder abuse line on 1800 353 374. And if your life is in danger, call triple zero (000) immediately.</p> <p><strong><em>Helen Baker is a licensed Australian financial adviser and author of On Your Own Two Feet: The Essential Guide to Financial Independence for all Women. Helen is among the 1% of financial planners who hold a master’s degree in the field. Proceeds from book sales are donated to charities supporting disadvantaged women and children. Find out more at <a href="http://www.onyourowntwofeet.com.au/">www.onyourowntwofeet.com.au</a></em></strong></p> <p><strong><em>Disclaimer: The information in this article is of a general nature only and does not constitute personal financial or product advice. Any opinions or views expressed are those of the authors and do not represent those of people, institutions or organisations the owner may be associated with in a professional or personal capacity unless explicitly stated. Helen Baker is an authorised representative of BPW Partners Pty Ltd AFSL 548754.</em></strong></p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images </em></p>

Caring

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What does financial abuse really look like?

<p>Sally is in her 20s, lives in a dilapidated rental home and works three jobs. Fifty-something Sarah owns a large home, drives a Mercedes and is a corporate executive. Pensioner Scott, in his mid-70s, still lives in the home in which he and his late wife raised their children. Who would you say is more vulnerable to financial abuse?</p> <p>The answer, you may be surprised to learn, is all three. Financial abuse, according to the government’s <a href="https://moneysmart.gov.au/living-in-retirement/financial-abuse">MoneySmart</a>, is a type of family and domestic violence:</p> <p>“It often happens alongside other types of violence, such as physical or emotional abuse. It can leave you feeling vulnerable, isolated, depressed and anxious. It can also take away your independence.”</p> <p>Commonly a spouse or partner is the perpetrator, but it can come from any relative or friend. A <a href="https://www.commbank.com.au/content/dam/caas/newsroom/docs/Cost%2520of%2520financial%2520abuse%2520in%2520Australia.pdf">2022 Commonwealth Bank report</a> suggests over 623,000 Australians experienced financial abuse in 2020 alone – roughly one in 30 women and one in 50 men. Anyone – regardless of age, wealth etc. – can be a victim. </p> <p><strong>Financial abuse has many faces</strong></p> <p>Just as finances are complex, so too is financial abuse, which can be viewed from many angles:</p> <ul> <li>Couples: One partner controls everything money related. I know of one instance where a woman’s partner went so far as counting coffee pods; another checked car mileage to stop his partner driving further than school drop-offs.</li> <li>Exes: Not working specifically to avoid paying child support; withholding information to delay settlement; bullying into a menial settlement.</li> <li>Multi-generations: Children or grandchildren milking elderly relatives; seizing control over their finances and living arrangements.</li> <li>Non-relatives: Such as friends buying property together without properly documenting everything, then fighting come sale time.</li> <li>Business relationships: Duped signatures on trust and business documents; hiding debts; impeding or undervaluing someone’s exit.</li> </ul> <p><strong>Warning signs </strong></p> <p>There are common warning signs that you, or someone you know, is suffering financial abuse:</p> <ul> <li>Pressure to make decisions: to invest your money or superannuation in crazy things that go bust, or to do nothing and not keep up with inflation (let alone grow your wealth), go guarantor on a loan, or sign power of attorney.</li> <li>Draining money: using your money to fund their business or investment on the promise a return is coming that never does (which could be poor management or deliberate deceit). This could continue for years until you’re left homeless and bankrupt.</li> <li>Unfair claims: your partner came into the relationship with nothing and stays just long enough to make a claim on your home.</li> <li>Controlled spending: this may start small (‘Don’t spend so much on clothes!’) but can become extreme. </li> <li>Blackmail: I’ve heard of people denied access to their grandkids unless they gave their son/daughter money or amended their will.</li> <li>Restricted access: you’re denied access to your own or joint finances, from having your own accounts, or are banned from working to earn your own income and superannuation.</li> <li>Tracking: sharing your location by smartphone may sound practical or safe but is open to abuse.</li> <li>Social isolation: cutting you off from friends and family; pressing for an interstate move.</li> <li>Reckless spending: your money is spent haphazardly – you may be kept in the dark or pressured not to ask questions.</li> <li>Tying down: trapping you into a big mortgage to crimp your freedom.</li> <li>Guilting: I have seen wealthy adults guilt their less fortunate parents into paying their bills, and gambling addicts guilt partners into paying their debts (with no intention to address their addiction or plan to pay it back).</li> </ul> <p><strong>Protecting yourself</strong></p> <p>The best prevention of all is to avoid thinking ‘it won’t happen to me’. So many victims of financial abuse once thought exactly the same.</p> <p>Other tips include:</p> <ul> <li>Speak up: Sometimes, starting a conversation can be enough to deliver positive change and even save a relationship (avoiding divorce is cheaper for everyone!)</li> <li>Have an emergency fund – cash only you can access, easily, in a crisis.</li> <li>Keep separate bank accounts – deposit your income here, then transfer money for joint bills into a joint account. </li> <li>Make decisions together – don’t leave money matters to your partner/children. It’s your money too.</li> <li>Get outside perspective: financial advisers are accountable to you as their client and help provide visibility over your assets, liabilities and risks. Ensure they are qualified and currently practicing.</li> </ul> <p>If you think you may be a victim of financial abuse, I beg you – seek help immediately. Suffering in silence and letting the situation snowball is the costliest thing you can do. Both financially and emotionally!</p> <p><a href="http://www.lifeline.org.au/">Lifeline - </a>13 11 14</p> <p><a href="https://www.1800respect.org.au/">1800RESPECT - </a>1800 737 732</p> <p><a href="https://www.familyrelationships.gov.au/talk-someone/advice-line">Family Relationship Advice Line - </a>1800 050 32</p> <p><a href="https://goodshep.org.au/">Good Shepherd Australia Financial Independence Hub  - </a>1300 050 150</p> <p><a href="http://www.ndh.org.au/">National Debt Helpline - </a>1800 007 007</p> <p><strong><em>Helen Baker is a licensed Australian financial adviser and author of the new book, On Your Own Two Feet: The Essential Guide to Financial Independence for all Women (Ventura Press, $32.99). Helen is among the 1% of financial planners who hold a master’s degree in the field. Proceeds from book sales are donated to charities supporting disadvantaged women and children. Find out more at <a href="http://www.onyourowntwofeet.com.au">www.onyourowntwofeet.com.au</a></em></strong></p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images </em></p>

Money & Banking

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Victims of child sexual abuse react to Cardinal Pell's death

<p>Victims of childhood sexual abuse have shared their reactions to the news of the death of Cardinal George Pell. </p> <p>Pell, who was previously convicted for historic sex crimes, died at age 81 in Rome on Wednesday after complications from hip replacement surgery. </p> <p>Phil Nagle, who was assaulted by a priest at the age of nine, said bluntly, "He's certainly burning in hell right now."</p> <p>"I'm glad he's passed on," he told <a href="https://9now.nine.com.au/a-current-affair/reaction-to-cardinal-george-pells-death/33dd1fd4-fb5a-4fd0-9cba-54da4d4de15b" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><em>A Current Affair</em></a>. </p> <p>Nagle went on to say he believed Pell "was a liar and a protector of paedophile clergy".</p> <p>"(He) had plenty of opportunities during his lifetime to try and redeem himself," he said.</p> <p>"It's a bit of a shame he's taken the secrets to the grave."</p> <p>Victims advocate Helen Last said she "felt really numb" when she heard about Pell's death.</p> <p>"It's a tragedy of great proportions. There's so many survivors in Victoria still who have not been able to come forward about alleged abuse by him, on them," she said.</p> <p>"I personally believe on the basis of evidence that George Pell has been involved in a network of sexual offending clergy that goes right back."</p> <p>Sex abuse victim Michael Advocate said his shed weren't of sorrow when he heard about Pell's passing.</p> <p>"He was a terrible, terrible human being that just damaged so many child sex abuse victims, including me," Advocate said.</p> <p>"There's so many of my fellow sufferers, you know … he got off so lightly. I hope he really gets justice."</p> <p>"If there is a God, dear God may he be forthright in his punishment."</p> <p>Despite an onslaught of similar comments from members of the public who stand with Pell's accusers, famous friends of the Church were quick to share their sadness over the Cardinal's death. </p> <p>Former Prime Minister Tony Abbott, a Catholic and staunch Pell supporter, described the cardinal as a "saint" and compared the sexual abuse charges that effectively ended his ecclesiastical career to "a modern form of crucifixion".</p> <p>Reacting to Abbott's statement on Instagram, former <em>7News Melbourne</em> host Jacqui Felgate summed up the anger felt by Pell's critics with a brutal, three-word response.</p> <p>"Beyond the pale," she wrote.</p> <p>Many of Felgate's followers agreed, with former <em>Bachelor</em> star Matthew Johnson saying, "This is absolutely abhorrent and really puts into perspective what type of person [he is]."</p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images </em></p>

News

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“I’ve tasted the faintest bitter edge of racism”: Ash Barty admits to being racially abused

<p dir="ltr">Ash Barty has confessed that she’s been on the receiving end of “bitter racism” after finding out about her Indigenous heritage. </p> <p dir="ltr">In her autobiography, <em>My Dream Time</em>, which will be published on November 2, Barty opens up about the moment she found out about her family’s past. </p> <p dir="ltr">The former tennis player said it was a difficult moment when her father searched for the truth and eventually told Barty and her sister which then led to “vile racism”. </p> <p dir="ltr">“I’ve seen glimpses and tasted the faintest bitter edge of racism” she wrote.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I’d win a Deadly Award but get vilified on line. I’d become a Tennis Australia First Nations Ambassador and then find some muppet calling my heritage into question.”</p> <p dir="ltr">The three-time Grand Slam winner said there was still a lot of work and educated needed to address the importance of Indigenous Australians. </p> <p dir="ltr">“There was no need for us to talk about that in the moment but it was certainly something that confused me a little bit as to why someone would criticise something that is so personal to me,” she told NewsCorp.</p> <p dir="ltr">“Looking back now it’s all about the education and giving people the tools to understand others and appreciate what came before us.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Barty went on to reveal that her trip to Central Australia where she worked with First Nations children was when she was convinced of a connection with them. </p> <p dir="ltr">“If anything it has just reassured to me that the path I want to go down in the future is to try and help First Nations youth around the country.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Eventually, Barty found out of her Indigenous heritage when her father Rob traced back his roots. </p> <p dir="ltr">At 13 he was told by a cousin that there was Indigenous heritage in the family but his parents denied it, claiming their connection was only to Māoris in New Zealand. </p> <p dir="ltr">Rob did not accept that and went on to trace back his family history where he found out that his great grandmother was an Indigenous Australian who married a white man. </p> <p dir="ltr">Barty’s dad sat her and her sister down when she was just seven and told them the truth. </p> <p dir="ltr">The family then went on to record their names with the Ngarigu Nation. </p> <p dir="ltr">“It was not a conversation his parents could have with him,” she wrote.</p> <p dir="ltr">“To his parents, Aboriginal ancestry was something to be ashamed of and not something he should be curious about.”</p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Images: Instagram</em></p>

Family & Pets

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James Corden's grovelling apology after being accused of "abusive" restaurant behaviour

<p>James Corden has made a grovelling apology after being blasted by a New York restauranteur for "abusive" behaviour towards his staff. </p> <p>Restaurant owner Keith McNally condemned Corden in a lengthy Instagram post in which he <a href="https://www.oversixty.co.nz/lifestyle/food-wine/james-corden-banned-from-restaurant-over-abusive-behaviour" target="_blank" rel="noopener">shared allegations</a> of the talk show host behaving unacceptably in his renowned restaurants, resulting in McNally banning Corden from attending his restaurants.</p> <p>After the post garnered global attention, the restauranteur shared another post in which he claimed Corden called him to apologise for his behaviour. </p> <p>The post reads, "James Corden just called me and apologised profusely. Having f***ed up myself more than most people, I strongly believe in second chances."</p> <p>"So if James Corden lets me host his <em>Late Late Show</em> for 9 months, I’ll immediately rescind his ban from Balthazar. No, of course not. But....anyone magnanimous enough to apologize to a deadbeat layabout like me (and my staff) doesn’t deserve to be banned from anywhere. Especially Balthazar."</p> <p>"So Come Back to the 5 &amp; Dime, Jimmy Corden, Jimmy Corden. All is Forgiven. xx"</p> <p>Despite hearing of his apology, many fans were suspicious of Corden's motives. </p> <p>One person commented, "Of course he apologised. He’s being dragged everywhere online. The only form of an acceptable apology is changed behaviour."</p> <p>Another said, "Funny how he was apologetic after every news outlet picked up this story."</p> <p>Others suggested that it wasn't McNally's place to forgive the behaviour when it was it staff who allegedly copped the brunt of it. </p> <p>One person said, "Why apologise to you and not the staff?" while another added, "He should attend Balthazar again and order just a beer and leave a $2000 tip and a written apology to your wonderful staff."</p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images</em></p>

Food & Wine

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James Corden banned from restaurant over "abusive" behaviour

<p dir="ltr">James Corden has been called out by renowned restaurateur Keith McNally for his “abusive” behaviour in a well-known New York restaurant.</p> <p dir="ltr">The talk show host was reportedly “extremely nasty” to staff, with McNally calling Corden a “tiny cretin of a man” over his actions.</p> <p dir="ltr">In a lengthy Instagram post, McNally recounted instances of Corden behaving inappropriately at his former restaurant, Cafe Luxembourg, on several occasions which left one server “shaken”.</p> <p dir="ltr">He started by calling Corden a “hugely gifted comedian”, before ripping into the Tony winner for his unacceptable restaurant behaviours.</p> <p dir="ltr">He said, “James Corden is a Hugely gifted comedian, but a tiny Cretin of a man. And the most abusive customer to my Balthazar servers since the restaurant opened 25 years ago."</p> <p dir="ltr">"I don't often 86 a customer, to today I 86'd Corden. It did not make me laugh.”</p> <p dir="ltr">In two manager's reports, McNally shared that Corden had demanded free drinks, threatened to leave bad reviews, verbally abused staff and berated restaurant chefs.</p> <p dir="ltr">Corden, a big-time foodie, has not yet responded to the allegations.</p> <p dir="ltr">McNally’s post racked up over 18,000 likes in just six hours, as the comment section was flooded with people condemning Corden’s alleged behaviour.</p> <p dir="ltr">One person said, “One can tell the true character of a person based on how they treat their server.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Another commented, “I’m always astounded (and impressed) by the lengths you and your staff go to appease, what I deem to be, extremely high maintenance (and sometimes unreasonable) clientele.”</p> <p dir="ltr">“I’ve often wondered if there’s a limit to that tolerance and appeasement. I’m really glad to see that there is. No staff should be treated like this, no matter how fine an establishment.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Another called out McNally’s allegations, saying, “Come on Keith, you know this isn’t true. James Corden is NOT a ‘hugely gifted’ comedian.”</p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image credits: Getty Images</em></p>

Food & Wine

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"Sad, old menacing coward:" Grace Tame reports childhood abuser to police

<p dir="ltr">Activist Grace Tame has revealed she continues to be harassed by the man who abused her as a child, having reported him to the police for “targeted harassment” online.</p> <p dir="ltr">Ms Tame was 15 when she was groomed and raped by her maths teacher Nicolaas Bester, who then bragged about his crimes online while she was unable to speak out due to Tasmania’s “gag law”.</p> <p dir="ltr">Her legal fight to change the laws, which prevent sexual abuse victims from publicly identifying themselves, as part of the #LetHerSpeak campaign, saw Ms Tame pushed into the public eye and recognised for her efforts when she was named the Australian of the Year.</p> <p dir="ltr">But, on Wednesday the 23-year-old said she was “still dealing with open threats and harassment from the man who abused me and others”.</p> <p dir="ltr">“This has been my reality for 12 years now, behind closed doors for my family and me,” she wrote on Twitter.</p> <p dir="ltr">She also shared screenshots of tweets appearing to be from Bester, where her childhood email is referenced and he threatens that “he is coming to show all too (sic) you”.</p> <p dir="ltr">In one message dated April 27, Bester uses her email address and writes, “at last I shall come for [email address]..... in good time…..”.</p> <p><span id="docs-internal-guid-f717230e-7fff-daf2-45a4-7cf9c4cb0c6a"></span></p> <p dir="ltr">In another, posted on August 28, he uses her email address again, writing that “the good old comeuppance on its way” with “only 4 weeks to go!!”.</p> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> <p dir="ltr" lang="en">This has been the reality for 12 years now, behind closed doors for my family and me.</p> <p>Mark my words, I am not going anywhere though.</p> <p>— Grace Tame (@TamePunk) <a href="https://twitter.com/TamePunk/status/1564185208882352128?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">August 29, 2022</a></p></blockquote> <p dir="ltr">“Here he is, the twice-convicted child sex offender, referring to my childhood email, which very few people know, in place of my name. It was the login to my old Facebook he and I communicated on,” Ms Tame wrote.</p> <p dir="ltr">“He’s counting down to an act of revenge, planned for the day of my book’s release.”</p> <p dir="ltr">She alleged that his repeated comments constituted a federal offence and contravened <a href="https://help.twitter.com/en/rules-and-policies/sexual-exploitation-policy">Twitter’s child exploitation policy</a>, which says that content that further contributes to the victimisation of children “through the promotion or glorification of child sexual exploitation” is also prohibited.</p> <p dir="ltr">“This is targeted harassment of a known victim of his past crimes, designed to cause further harm,” Ms Tame said.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I’ve reported them to police, but our reactive justice system is too slow, and nothing’s changed.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Bester was sentenced to two years and 10 months in prison for maintaining a sexual relationship with someone under the age of 17 and possession of child exploitation material, but only served one year and nine months before he was released.</p> <p dir="ltr">He has been free to speak about his abuse of Ms Tame for some time and has previously taken to social media to brag to his followers.</p> <p dir="ltr">“The majority of men in Australia envy me,” he wrote.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I was 59, she was 15 going on 25. It was awesome.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Bester’s account has since been suspended by Twitter.</p> <p dir="ltr">Ms Tame said her tweets were an act of reclaiming power “against a predator operating in plain sight”.</p> <p dir="ltr">“This man seems to think he is still relevant and can maintain control over me,” she wrote.</p> <p dir="ltr">“This man who groomed and abused me when I was a child.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I’m not ashamed of any of it now.</p> <p dir="ltr">“But he should be. He was an adult who abused his authority.</p> <p dir="ltr">“Just because I have found the anger and strength in me now, does it make me an aggressor, or a survivor?</p> <p dir="ltr">"I know who I am. I am a survivor. </p> <p dir="ltr">"I have the power to be vulnerable. He will never have that. He is too afraid, and too weak. He is too weak to be vulnerable. Instead, he exploits others who are. He knows no other way to be. I see that now. And because of that, he doesn't scare me anymore.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Ms Tame added that her posts were “not for the critics” and were instead for survivors like her.</p> <p dir="ltr">"He is a sad, old menacing coward.</p> <p dir="ltr">“This is not for the critics. They will say what they always say. This is for the people like me. And you know who you are too.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I stand with you. We have the power.”</p> <p dir="ltr"><span id="docs-internal-guid-5922148f-7fff-0a6b-a1ff-adbf0776ba85"></span></p> <p dir="ltr"><em><strong>If you or someone you know needs support as a result of sexual assault or child sexual abuse, contact the Blue Knot Helpline and Redress Support Service on 1300 657 380, or LifeLine on 13 11 14 for immediate support.</strong></em></p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image: Getty Images</em></p>

Legal

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“Healing from grief is an inside job”: Why Ashley Judd found and met with her abuser

<p dir="ltr">Content warning: This article includes mentions of sexual assault, rape and child sexual abuse (CSA).</p> <p dir="ltr">Ashley Judd has opened up about the conversation she had with the man who raped her more than two decades ago.</p> <p dir="ltr">The <em>Double Jeopardy </em>star spoke about confronting the man who assaulted her in 1999 during an appearance on the podcast <em>Healing With David Kessler</em>, telling host David Kessler that they had a “restorative-justice conversation”.</p> <p dir="ltr">“To make a long story short, we ended up in rocking chairs sitting by a creek together,” Judd said. “And I said, ‘I’m very interested in hearing the story you’ve carried all these years’. And we had a restorative-justice conversation about that.</p> <p dir="ltr">"I wanted to share that story because there are many ways of healing from grief, and it's important to remind listeners that I didn't need anything from him and it was just gravy that he made his amends and expressed his deep remorse because healing from grief is an inside job."</p> <p dir="ltr">The 54-year-old added that she didn’t need closure from the man, whose identity is still unknown, or “his cooperation” or “for him to make amends” to continue healing, and that she was just “very interested in hearing” his side of the story.</p> <p dir="ltr">"Because I had the opportunity to do my trauma work, to do my grief work, to do my healing work, to have all these shifts in my own consciousness and to bond in these female coalition spaces with other survivors," Judd said. </p> <p dir="ltr">Recalling the incident, Judd described it as “crazy-making” and “unconscionable”.</p> <p dir="ltr">"I was very clear, my boundaries were intact. I was already an empowered, adult feminist woman," she recalled. </p> <p dir="ltr">"And that this could happen under these circumstances was unconscionable, unforeseen, and yet I have had a restorative-justice process with this person out of how replete my soul is today."</p> <p dir="ltr">Judd has publicly spoken about being a three-time rape survivor in the past and shared her story for the first time in her 2011 memoir, <em>All That Is Bitter &amp; Sweet</em>, and again in an <a href="https://www.mic.com/articles/113226/forget-your-team-your-online-violence-toward-girls-and-women-is-what-can-kiss-my-ass" target="_blank" rel="noopener">op-ed</a> she wrote for <em>Mic.com</em>’s ‘Pass the Mic’ series.</p> <p dir="ltr">"I am a survivor of sexual assault, rape and incest," she wrote at the time. </p> <p dir="ltr">"The summer of 1984 was tough for me. I experienced two rapes by an adult and systematic molestation from another adult, who also had another man in the room watching … This January, I read three different things that freshly triggered an additional, very specific memory from age 15 – an attempted oral rape by yet another adult man."</p> <p dir="ltr"><strong><em>If you or someone you know is impacted by sexual assault or childhood sexual abuse and need support, contact 1800RESPECT on 1800 737 732 or visit their <a href="https://www.1800respect.org.au/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">website</a>, or contact <a href="https://blueknot.org.au/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">BlueKnot</a> on 1300 657 380.</em></strong></p> <p><em><span id="docs-internal-guid-9fcf9217-7fff-3f43-fab5-e53785cce460"></span></em></p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image: Getty Images</em></p>

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Princess Mary removes son from high school amid bullying and abuse allegations

<p>Crown Princess Mary and Crown Prince Frederik have pulled their son Prince Christian from his high school following a bullying scandal that has sent shock waves through Europe.</p> <p>They've also confirmed Princess Isabella will no longer be attending the prestigious Herlufsholm Boarding School.</p> <p>The Royal couple have issued a statement announcing the move, weeks after allegations emerged of a violent culture filled with abuse and bullying at the school.</p> <p>Students have also come forward, accusing the school and its staff of covering up their stories of abuse.</p> <p>"The question about our son Christian's and our daughter Isabella's choice of school has been very important for us, and the unfortunate matter has brought many and strong opinions into play in the public," Crown Prince Frederik and Crown Princess Mary said in a joint statement.</p> <p>"That is completely understandable when it deals with the well-being of children and young people. At the same time, it has been important to stand by our basic idea that major decisions must be made on an informed basis. We now have that basis."</p> <p>Their message comes after the release of a preliminary decision from Denmark's National Agency for Education and Quality that "directs a particularly harsh critique" of the boarding school.</p> <p>"It has been a difficult process for us as a family, but, based on the overall picture and our special position as Crown Prince Couple, we have chosen that Prince Christian will stop at Herlufsholm and that Princess Isabella will not start in ninth class at the school after the summer holiday.</p> <p>"During the summer, we, together with our children, will make a decision about their future choice of schools.</p> <p>"With thoughts about the many students who will continue at Herlufsholm, it is our hope that the school now gets more peace to ensure the necessary changes and succeeds in creating a culture in which all thrive and feel safe."</p> <p>A documentary has aired, which included claims from a student who described being sexually abused by another student.</p> <p>Another student then spoke of corporal punishment and a third described being assaulted during a party at the school.</p> <p>In November 2021, four students were expelled after being accused of taking part in the abuse and filming a number of incidents.</p> <p>Some students have claimed staff turned a blind eye to these stories.</p> <p>When the allegations came to light, Princess Mary and her husband issued a swift response expressing their shock and disappointment.</p> <p>"As parents of a child who goes to Herlufsholm, we are deeply shaken by the testimonies that have emerged in the current documentary about the school," the Crown Prince couple said.</p> <p>"It is heart-breaking to hear about systematic bullying and about the culture of abuse and violence that many have been a part of. That is completely unacceptable. As parents, we expect the school to effectively ensure a culture where everyone is safe and part of the community, and we will in the coming time follow the changes that are obviously necessary."</p> <p>Herlufsholm was founded in 1565 for Danish nobility and is located 80km outside of Copenhagen in Næstved. The allegations about the school follow earlier claims about tough disciplinary practises at the institution.</p> <p>Herlufsholm School responded to the documentary's claims in a statement, with the school’s rector Mikkel Kjellberg saying many of the allegations contained within the television program were "very old cases have been used from another time - where the culture at Herlufsholm was different".</p> <p>He said the bullying and violence were "not part of the culture at Herlufsholm".</p> <p>"Bullying, violence or sexual abuse is not acceptable at Herlufsholm School," Kjellberg added.</p> <p>Princess Mary's charity issued a separate statement via The Mary Foundation. While they don't normally comment on "individual cases", the allegations contained within the documentary are "very violent and shocking".</p> <p><em>Image: Instagram</em></p>

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Could the Depp v. Heard case make other abuse survivors too scared to speak up?

<p>Johnny Depp has <a href="https://www.abc.net.au/news/2022-06-02/verdict-delivered-johnny-depp-amber-heard-trial/101115246" target="_blank" rel="noopener">won his defamation suit</a> against his ex-wife Amber Heard for her Washington Post op-ed article published in 2018, which <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/live/2022/06/01/arts/johnny-depp-amber-heard-verdict">stated</a> she was a “public figure representing domestic abuse”.</p> <p>The facts in every case are unique, and the jury is always in a better position to judge these facts than commentators relying on media reports.</p> <p>Nevertheless in such a high profile case as this, the verdict has a ripple effect that can go beyond the facts. The unfortunate reality is the Depp Heard case is likely to reinforce the fear that women who come forward with claims of sexual and domestic abuse will encounter a system in which they are unlikely to be believed.</p> <p>Reform is needed to better balance the protection of men’s individual reputations with the rights of women to speak about their experiences.</p> <p><strong>Defamation a tool of elite men</strong></p> <p>Depp was awarded more than US$10 million in damages after convincing the jury Heard was a malicious liar.</p> <p>This is despite the fact a <a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/media/2022/06/01/johnny-depp-libel-law-uk-us/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">UK judge determined</a> in 2020 that it was “substantially true” Depp had assaulted Heard repeatedly during their relationship.</p> <p>After the verdict, Heard commented she was “heartbroken that the mountain of evidence still was not enough to stand up to the disproportionate power, influence, and sway” of her famous ex-husband.</p> <p>Historically, the common law of defamation was built to <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/09612025.2021.1949822" target="_blank" rel="noopener">protect public men in their professions and trades</a>. It worked to both defend their reputations individually and shut down speech about them as a group.</p> <p><a href="https://heinonline.org/HOL/Page?handle=hein.journals/comulp2&amp;div=6&amp;g_sent=1&amp;casa_token=fybEy5Ip_goAAAAA:mZwcFssrx7DMteRZh-2VpbadOiPG52vukVjaL_zAG2Rr-r9-GIbN1HpUADIArNrKIooONYOmpoKf&amp;collection=journals" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Data from the United States in the late 20th century</a> shows women comprise only 11% of plaintiffs bringing defamation suits.</p> <p>As legal scholar Diane Borden <a href="https://heinonline.org/HOL/LandingPage?handle=hein.journals/comulp2&amp;div=6&amp;id=&amp;page=" target="_blank" rel="noopener">has noted</a>, the majority of libel plaintiffs are “men engaged in corporate or public life who boast relatively elite standing in their communities”.</p> <p>Defamation trials – which run according to complex and idiosyncratic rules – are often lengthy and expensive, thus favouring those with the resources to instigate and pursue them.</p> <p>Various defences exist, including arguing that the comments are factually true, or that they were made on occasions of “qualified privilege”, where a person has a duty to communicate information and the recipient has a corresponding interest in receiving it.</p> <p>But in one way or another, disputes concerning allegations of sexual and domestic abuse usually come down to matters of credibility and believability that play on gendered stereotypes.</p> <p>It becomes another version of “he said, she said”, and as we’ve seen from the social media response to Amber Heard, women making these types of allegations are often positioned as vengeful or malicious liars before their cases even reach the courts. This is despite the fact <a href="https://www.aihw.gov.au/getmedia/0375553f-0395-46cc-9574-d54c74fa601a/aihw-fdv-5.pdf.aspx?inline=true" target="_blank" rel="noopener">sexual assault</a> and <a href="https://www.safesteps.org.au/understanding-family-violence/who-experiences-family-violence/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">intimate partner violence</a> are common, and <a href="https://apo.org.au/sites/default/files/resource-files/2017-09/apo-nid107216_1.pdf" target="_blank" rel="noopener">false reporting</a> <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26679304/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">is rare</a>.</p> <p>In fact, most victims don’t tell the police, their employer or others what happened to them due to <a href="https://theconversation.com/almost-90-of-sexual-assault-victims-do-not-go-to-police-this-is-how-we-can-achieve-justice-for-survivors-157601" target="_blank" rel="noopener">fears</a> of not being believed, facing professional consequences, or being subject to <a href="https://pursuit.unimelb.edu.au/articles/the-online-hate-for-amber-heard" target="_blank" rel="noopener">shaming and further abuse</a>.</p> <p>Heard has received thousands of <a href="https://www.reuters.com/business/media-telecom/amber-heard-says-she-receives-death-threats-every-day-over-depp-claims-2022-05-26/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">death threats</a> and suffered relentless mockery on social media.</p> <p><strong>Time for reform</strong></p> <p>The global #MeToo movement and recent Australian campaigns, such as those instigated by Grace Tame and Brittany Higgins, encourage survivors to speak out and push collectively for change.</p> <p>But now, ruinous and humiliating defamation suits could further coerce and convince women to keeping their experiences quiet and private. Measures must be taken to better protect public speech on such matters.</p> <p>One potential way forward is for defamation trials involving imputations of gendered abuse to incorporate expert evidence about the nature of sexual and domestic violence in our society.</p> <p>For decades, <a href="https://heinonline.org/HOL/Page?handle=hein.journals/hwlj19&amp;div=8&amp;g_sent=1&amp;casa_token=&amp;collection=journals" target="_blank" rel="noopener">feminist legal scholars</a> fought for the inclusion of such evidence in criminal trials, especially those relating to matters of self-defence in domestic homicides and issues of consent in rape proceedings.</p> <p>Expert sociological and psychological evidence can combat and discredit ingrained patriarchal assumptions and myths – comments and questions such as “what was she wearing?”; “why didn’t she fight back?”; “why didn’t she just leave him?”; “why was she nice to him afterwards?” or “why didn’t she tell people at the time?”</p> <p>Otherwise, pervasive gender bias – often held by both men and women, judge and jury – can undermine the voices and accounts of women before they even set foot in court, before they even open their mouths.</p> <p>Defamation trials have not traditionally included such expert evidence. But now that they have become a powerful forum for silencing speech about gendered harm, perhaps it’s time they did so.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/184324/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/jessica-lake-126813" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Jessica Lake</a>, Research Fellow, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/australian-catholic-university-747" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Australian Catholic University</a></em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/could-the-depp-v-heard-case-make-other-abuse-survivors-too-scared-to-speak-up-184324" target="_blank" rel="noopener">original article</a>.</em></p> <p><em>Image: Getty Images</em></p>

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“We’re all still living with it”: ‘Hey Dad!’ abuse victim speaks out

<p dir="ltr"><em>Content warning: This article includes mentions of sexual assault and child sexual abuse.</em></p> <p dir="ltr">Former Hey Dad! child star Sarah Monahan has spoken out after she learning the man who sexually abused her on national television will be released from prison.</p> <p dir="ltr">Monahan told <em><a href="https://9now.nine.com.au/a-current-affair/former-hey-dad-child-star-sarah-monahan-speaks-out-as-robert-hughes-granted-parole/39c59cbe-394b-4a09-8ca3-63f2504d8acf" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A Current Affair</a></em> that the release of her former TV dad, Robert Hughes, had made her feel emotional, angry, and relieved.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I think we went from sadness, to despair, to bitterness,” she said.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I did not make it through the phone call without like, just tears coming out. There’s just been so much over so long and I guess it is now… it’s just … it’s over.”</p> <p dir="ltr">“He will never say sorry and I’m fine with that. He’ll never say it. I’m not going to beg for it; I’m not going to ask for it,” she added.</p> <p dir="ltr">In 2014, Hughes was convicted for sexual assault offences involving four girls and wasn’t eligible for parole until 2020.</p> <p dir="ltr">After serving eight years of his decade-long prison sentence for sexually abusing four girls, the 74-year-old TV star has been granted parole.</p> <p dir="ltr">In a 13 page judgement, the New South Wales State Parole Authority announced the decision, writing that the “offences took place in particular settings in which the offender abused his power and his position of trust”.</p> <p dir="ltr">While the parole authority was considering the decision at a public hearing last week, Monahan arrived in Sydney from the US and spoke with <em>A Current Affair </em>about her abuser.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I’m not scared of him anymore … he’s not going to be able to intimidate me anymore,” she said.</p> <p dir="ltr">With Hughes being granted parole, Monahan said she and the other victims would no longer have to face yearly parole applications.</p> <p dir="ltr">Now, Hughes will be heading to a detention centre before being deported back to the UK, having previously renounced his Australian citizenship.</p> <p dir="ltr">“He gets to move on with his life to go to England, but we’re still all living with it. So I guess it’s not really the release that I thought it would be,” Monahan said.</p> <p dir="ltr">He will also be subject to Interpol notification orders, meaning he’ll have to report to the UK police within days of arriving, as well as yearly, and inform Interpol of his address, any travel plans, and if he plans to stay at an address where a child is present for longer than 12 hours.</p> <p dir="ltr">His wife, Robyn Gardner, has promised that Hughes will undergo psychological counselling.</p> <p dir="ltr">Hughes is also prohibited from contacting, communicating with, stalking, harassing or intimidating his victims or their families, and he cannot be in the company of a person under the age of 16 without a responsible adult present.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I’m sure he thinks he’s won and he’s very happy that he’s going to get to go home,” Monahan said.</p> <p dir="ltr">She added that now she just wants to put Hughes out of her life.</p> <p dir="ltr">“This has consumed my entire life for the last 12 years, 14 years, so I guess I’ll have to find a new me now,” she said.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I don’t want to be a victim anymore.”</p> <p><span id="docs-internal-guid-b9e52487-7fff-c70f-0a56-5235582d2525"></span></p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image: A Current Affair</em></p>

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Prince Andrew working on amends following sexual abuse allegations

<p dir="ltr">Prince Andrew is reportedly working on making amends following allegations he sexually abused a teenager. </p> <p dir="ltr">The Duke of York, 62, was accused by Virginia Giuffre, 38, of sexually assaulting her on three occasions when she was 17 at Ghislaine Maxwell's home in London, in Epstein's mansion in New York and on Epstein's private island in the US Virgin Islands.</p> <p dir="ltr">The pair reached an out-of-court settlement of £12 million with Prince Andrew now looking to make amends according to the ​​Archbishop of Canterbury, the Most Reverend Justin Welby. </p> <p dir="ltr">The Archbishop said society has become “very unforgiving” and that we should take a step back and see that the Duke of York is looking to make improvements. </p> <p dir="ltr">“Forgiveness really does matter. I think we have become a very, very unforgiving society. There's a difference between consequences and forgiveness,” Reverend Justin said in an interview on ITV.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I think for all of us, one of the ways that we celebrate when we come together is in learning to be a more open and forgiving society. </p> <p dir="ltr">“Now with Prince Andrew, I think we all have to step back a bit. He's seeking to make amends and I think that's a very good thing. </p> <p dir="ltr">“But you can't tell people how they're supposed to respond about this. And the issues of the past in the area of abuse are so intensely personal and private for so many people. </p> <p dir="ltr">“It's not surprising. There's very deep feelings, indeed.”</p> <p dir="ltr">The Archbishop also defended the Queen’s decision to walk with Prince Andrew at Prince Philip’s memorial service in March, saying she was “fully entitled” to do so.</p> <p dir="ltr">He however received backlash for his comments, forcing him to backtrack and release a statement clarifying what he meant about consequences and forgiveness.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I was asked a question about forgiveness, and I said that there is a difference between consequences and forgiveness,” the statement read. </p> <p dir="ltr">“Both are essential elements of the Christian understanding of justice, mercy and reconciliation.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I also made the broader point that I hope we can become a more forgiving society. These are complex issues that are difficult to address in a short media interview and I hope they do not distract from this week's joyful celebration of Her Majesty The Queen's Platinum Jubilee.”</p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image: Getty </em></p>

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Doctor Strange star and husband found guilty of child abuse

<p><em><strong>Warning: This article contains graphic content that some readers may find distressing. </strong></em></p> <p>Zara Phythian, star of Marvel's latest movie <em>Doctor Strange</em>, has been arrested alongside her husband Victor Marke , with the pair now facing jail. </p> <p>The couple have been found guilty of sexually abusing a 13-year-old girl multiple times between 2005 and 2008. </p> <p>According to The Sun, Phythian plied the teen with rum before making her perform a sex act on her husband, which occurred once or twice a month until the teen was finally able to free herself. </p> <p>Jurors heard that the couple were working as martial arts experts at the time, and Marke had sex with the victim at least 20 times on different occasions. </p> <p>Marke, 59, branded the allegations “paedophile sh*t” when quizzed by officers after his arrest, Nottingham Crown Court was told.</p> <p>He said he was “really angry” to be accused, and told officers, “If you’re trying to say I’m a paedophile, I’m not.”</p> <p>Marke claimed he had consensual sex with the teen when she was 18 – something his wife only discovered during her police interview.</p> <p>Phythian, 38, told detectives she’d never had any form of sexual contact with the girl, calling it “bulls**t”.</p> <p>Upon discovering her husband had revealed he’d had sex with her accuser, she said she felt “confused”, adding that she’d “liked to have known about it”.</p> <p>The victim said she “would never have come forward” and planned to “die with my shame”, but as she recently became a mother, she said she felt she had “no option to speak my truth”.</p> <p>Despite denying all allegations of abuse, the couple were found unanimously guilty by the jury. </p> <p>Judge Mark Watson will decide later when the pair will be sentenced.</p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images</em></p>

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Peter van Onselen reveals past abuse in debate with Grace Tame

<p dir="ltr"><em>Content warning: This article mentions paedophilia, child sexual abuse and rape.</em></p> <p dir="ltr">Grace Tame has called out Peter van Onselen, after the pair engaged in a heated conversation on Twitter that saw him disclose that he was also a victim of child sexual abuse.</p> <p dir="ltr">Van Onselen previously wrote in <em>The Australian </em>that he was “lucky” to not be abused by a notorious paedophile he had gained the attention of, and has now said that wasn’t the case.</p> <p><span id="docs-internal-guid-efd29e63-7fff-4e4d-1ca1-6027eb4c3f72"></span></p> <p dir="ltr">The conversation was sparked by van Onselen commenting on a separate tweet by Dr Gemma Carey, suggesting that her family being banned from the GP clinic they had been seeing for a long time was “a sign that you’re a complete pain in the arse”.</p> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> <p dir="ltr" lang="en">That’s how I felt when as a survivor myself of child sexual abuse (he was convicted) she accused me of being a threat to my wife. Unfortunately you then helped her raise money when I had the temerity to ask her to apologise. Thanks for all your support.</p> <p>— Peter van Onselen 🎣 (@vanOnselenP) <a href="https://twitter.com/vanOnselenP/status/1509487096087838722?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">March 31, 2022</a></p></blockquote> <p dir="ltr">Grace Tame retweeted a screenshot of his comment with the caption, “When you victimise a vulnerable person, that’s a pretty good sign too.”</p> <p dir="ltr">This prompted van Onselen to say he was a victim of child sexual abuse from a person who was convicted at the time that he shared his story to police.</p> <p dir="ltr">Tame replied noting that the person who he said abused him hadn’t been convicted of crimes against him, writing that “co-opting other survivors’ experiences is a whole new low, mate”.</p> <p dir="ltr">Van Onselen also said Tame forced him to make the disclosure after she accused him of co-opting the stories of other victims of the same person.</p> <p dir="ltr">“You have made me say this which is incredibly distressing but there you go,” he wrote. “The police knew of three other boys he raped who didn’t want to testify. I was one of them.”</p> <p dir="ltr"><span id="docs-internal-guid-c9360548-7fff-98c4-be3f-6ea3a0913765"></span></p> <p dir="ltr">“I was going off your own words, Peter. You are responsible for when and what you publicly disclose, not me. I ask again that you leave me alone now,” Tame replied, attaching a screenshot from his article in <em>The Australian</em>.</p> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> <p dir="ltr" lang="en">That’s how I felt when as a survivor myself of child sexual abuse (he was convicted) she accused me of being a threat to my wife. Unfortunately you then helped her raise money when I had the temerity to ask her to apologise. Thanks for all your support.</p> <p>— Peter van Onselen 🎣 (@vanOnselenP) <a href="https://twitter.com/vanOnselenP/status/1509487096087838722?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">March 31, 2022</a></p></blockquote> <p dir="ltr">“Like lots of survivors I have sought to not go public about what happened to me. I spoke to the police about exactly that as my abuser was being sentenced. Please stop shaming me for not having your courage to choose to go public.”</p> <p dir="ltr">“I have not shamed you, not once,” Tame replied. “You’re manipulating this entire situation. I have pointed out exactly what I have known to be true.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Tame returned to Twitter on Friday morning to explain the situation.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I stood up for a friend whom Peter demeaned unsolicitedly,” she wrote.</p> <p dir="ltr">“He then used ‘convicted’ paedophilia survivorship as a defence, in a tweet he copied and pasted several times - to me a paedophilia survivor. </p> <p dir="ltr">“Prior, he publicly aserted me he was “not sexually abused”, so I called him out.”</p> <p dir="ltr"><span id="docs-internal-guid-6b4eeb3f-7fff-b3a1-9376-35d9f05c57ec"></span></p> <p dir="ltr">Earlier the same day, she asserted that every survivor “deserves to be heard and respected”, but that trauma shouldn’t “excuse bad behaviour”.</p> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> <p dir="ltr" lang="en">Every survivor of rape and abuse deserves to be heard and receive compassion. Every single one.</p> <p>Trauma, however, doesn’t excuse bad behaviour. It is not a weapon of provocation or oneupmanship to deploy in the face of others at your convenience, especially not fellow survivors.</p> <p>— Grace Tame (@TamePunk) <a href="https://twitter.com/TamePunk/status/1509669097759723523?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">March 31, 2022</a></p></blockquote> <p dir="ltr">“It is not a weapon of provocation or one-up-manship to deploy in the face of others at your convenience, especially not fellow survivors.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Van Onselen originally wrote that he had been groomed by a paedophile but had not been abused in his <em>The Australian</em> piece.</p> <p dir="ltr">“To be very clear from the outset, I was not sexually abused, I am one of the lucky ones” he wrote at the time. </p> <p dir="ltr">“But only just. A teacher … tried to sexually assault me on a school trip. He was convicted for doing so to three other boys on that same trip.”</p> <p dir="ltr">But, he also wrote that he may have “dissociated” during the abuse and may “have blocked more that happened”.</p> <p dir="ltr">In his latest online spat, the Project co-host also referred to a previous altercation with Dr Carey, when he had threatened to sue her over a tweet suggesting he was a danger to his wife in an old photo with Christian Porter.</p> <p dir="ltr"><span id="docs-internal-guid-bb3532b8-7fff-cbec-0089-5e80c870db32"></span></p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image: Roy Vandervegt (Adelaide Festival) / Getty Images</em></p>

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“He was pure evil”: Grace Tame recalls the confrontation with her abuser

<p dir="ltr"><em>Content warning: This article mentions child sexual abuse and rape.</em></p> <p dir="ltr">Grace Tame has spoken out about the first time she “stood up” to her abuser, and how she would never forget telling him he was a “monster” and “pure evil”.</p> <p><span id="docs-internal-guid-88aeec46-7fff-121c-61f9-67cbbdb45285">The 2021 Australian of the Year spoke about her experience while addressing a packed audience at <a href="https://www.adelaidefestival.com.au/writers-week/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Adelaide Writers’ Week</a> alongside event director Jo Dyer and author Jess Hill.</span></p> <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-captioned="" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/Ca3zmxxJVhQ/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/Ca3zmxxJVhQ/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by Eventalaide (@eventalaide)</a></p> </div> </blockquote> <p dir="ltr">The Writers’ Week talk, entitled The Reckoning, saw Ms Tame open up about how she confronted the teacher who repeatedly raped her.</p> <p dir="ltr">Although she was “terrified of this paedophile”, Ms Tame said she “stood up” to him and told him “he was a monster” four days before she reported him to police.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I told him that, and I will always remember that, and you know what? So will he,” she <a href="https://www.abc.net.au/news/2022-03-09/grace-tame-recalls-the-moment-she-confronted-her-abuser/100895514" target="_blank" rel="noopener">said</a>.</p> <p dir="ltr">“My fear of upsetting the apple cart died that day.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Ms Tame was repeatedly abused while she was a student at Hobart’s St Michael’s Collegiate.</p> <p dir="ltr">She was 15 at the time.</p> <p dir="ltr">“He’d never seen my true rage towards him, but as he sat in his office chair I pointed a finger at him, I was crying my eyes out, I started yelling and screaming and I told him exactly what I thought of him,” she recounted.</p> <p dir="ltr">“And I told him I thought - I thought he was pure evil, and that I hoped he died, and I pointed to a picture of his own children who were twice my age at the time, and I told him I hated him for what he had done to me.</p> <p dir="ltr">“Whenever I think I can’t do something I remember this day - and I was terrified when I did this - but this is what I draw on when I need self-belief.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Since her abuser’s conviction, Ms Tame has campaigned for the way sexual assault is dealt with to be changed, and told Wednesday’s audience that legal restrictions preventing victims from sharing their stories contributed to an “ecosystem of abuse”.</p> <p><span id="docs-internal-guid-44561e80-7fff-29a3-1c07-e886a701c17a"></span></p> <p dir="ltr">“It’s so messed up how society has all these layers of victim-blaming entrenched, codified at every level,” she said.</p> <p dir="ltr"><img src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/2022/03/grace-tame1.jpg" alt="" width="1280" height="720" /></p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Grace Tame opened up about how she confronted her abuser at Adelaide Writers’ Week. Image: Roy Vandervegt / Adelaide Festival</em></p> <p dir="ltr">She added that the language used to describe sexual abuse and assault also partially contributed to said “ecosystem of abuse”.</p> <p dir="ltr">“That’s what really inspired me to pursue a different kind of advocacy because I thought, ‘Why am I learning about this word (grooming) for the first time seven years after I’ve gone through this experience?’” she <a href="https://www.adelaidenow.com.au/entertainment/adelaide-festival/the-reckoning-grace-tame-and-jess-hill-to-speak-at-adelaides-writers-week/news-story/e40b9959c254b735a383860b4fd5e920?utm_campaign=later-linkinbio-thetiser&amp;utm_content=later-25219761&amp;utm_medium=social&amp;utm_source=linkin.bio" target="_blank" rel="noopener">said</a>.</p> <p dir="ltr">“You know, like if you are stabbed for instance, you can say I was stabbed. This is what happened. These were the circumstances and then we also have the skillset to then ask for help - the appropriate help - but that’s certainly not what I had.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Ms Tame also shared more details about a “threatening” phone call she received last year asking her to refrain from saying anything negative about Prime Minister Scott Morrison.</p> <p dir="ltr">She first mentioned the phone call at the National Press Club last month, alleging a senior member of a government-funded organisation was the one who called her.</p> <p dir="ltr">On Wednesday, she elaborated on the incident and said “it wasn’t an empty threat”.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I didn’t share this at the National Press Club but do you know what the threat was, from that person who phoned me? It was that they wouldn’t support the [Grace Tame] Foundation if I said something about the Prime Minister,” she said.</p> <p dir="ltr">Following her Press Club address, Women’s Safety Minister Anne Ruston said the federal government had begun an investigation into Ms Tame’s allegation.</p> <p dir="ltr"><span id="docs-internal-guid-119bdff5-7fff-47b1-1e4a-3e38cc95cae1"></span></p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image: Roy Vandervegt / Adelaide Festival</em></p>

Caring

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Home Alone star accused of abuse in domestic spat

<p dir="ltr"><em>Home Alone</em><span> </span>actor Devin Ratray has been accused of domestic abuse towards his girlfriend, after the couple got into an argument at an Oklahoma City hotel.</p> <p dir="ltr">No charges have been made against the actor.</p> <p dir="ltr">Ratray’s significant other claimed the fight became physical, with him “strangling her and putting his hand over her mouth” as the fight escalated, according to<span> </span><a rel="noopener" href="https://www.thesun.co.uk/uncategorized/17030293/home-alone-star-devin-ratray-accused-strangle-girlfriend/" target="_blank"><em>The Sun</em></a>.</p> <p dir="ltr">She alleged that she then “bit his hand”, he “punched her in the face” and she fled to a stairwell.</p> <p dir="ltr">According to her police report, obtained by<span> </span><a rel="noopener" href="https://www.tmz.com/2021/12/12/home-alone-buzz-mccallister-fight-girlfriend-hotel-cops/" target="_blank"><em>TMZ</em></a>, she then “got her stuff and left, waiting for the cops to arrive”.</p> <p dir="ltr">Law enforcement sources told the publication they were called to a Hyatt hotel near downtown Oklahoma over a domestic dispute between Ratray and his partner earlier in the week.</p> <p dir="ltr">The source said everything was “sorted out once Devin and his girlfriend decided to go their separate ways for the night”.</p> <p dir="ltr">She stayed in a separate room and no arrests were made.</p> <p dir="ltr">However, Ratray’s representatives have said the pair argued but that nothing physical occurred, and the dispute resulted in the couple breaking up.</p> <p dir="ltr">They didn’t divulge any additional information about what the fight was about.</p> <p dir="ltr">The dispute comes a week after Ratray revealed that the<span> </span><em>Home Alone</em><span> </span>cast will host a “reunion” 31 years after the Christmas movie aired.</p> <p dir="ltr">However, Macaulay Culkin, who played Kevin, his younger brother Kieran Culkin, and Catherina O’Hara would not be attending the reunion.</p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Images: @devinratray (Instagram)</em></p>

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Never-before-seen photos emerge in Ghislaine Maxwell abuse trial

<p dir="ltr"><em>Content warning: This article contains graphic descriptions of child abuse and sexual assault, which may be triggering to some readers.</em></p> <p dir="ltr">British socialite Ghislaine Maxwell’s relationship with convicted sex offender Jeffrey Epstein has come under scrutiny in court, as she faces charges including sex trafficking of minors.</p> <p dir="ltr">Ms Maxwell has been on trial over accusations of helping Epstein recruit and sexually abuse four underage girls, to which she has pleaded guily to.</p> <p dir="ltr">As the trial reaches its seventh day of proceedings, three of the four women have testified against the 59-year-old former girlfriend of Epstein.</p> <p dir="ltr">She has consistently denied playing a role in the series of sexual assaults Epstein has been accused and charged for, with her legal team echoing her claims.</p> <p dir="ltr">Ms Maxwell’s lawyers have said her accusers’ memories have been corrupted over time, with lawyer Bobbi C. Sternheim telling the court that she is being treated as “a scapegoat for a man who behaved badly”.</p> <p dir="ltr"><img style="width: 500px; height: 281.25px;" src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/7846239/epstein1.jpg" alt="" data-udi="umb://media/dc2969dfb3f14dd2afa3906c3ea118a3" /></p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image:<span> </span></em><em>US District Attorney’s Office</em></p> <p dir="ltr">However, a document presented before the court on Tuesday has provided a conflicting view of the relationship between them.</p> <p dir="ltr">An FBI digital forensic examiner shared details of the document, which was created by a user called ‘GMax’ on a computer seized by the agency from Epstein’s New York mansion in 2019.</p> <p dir="ltr">The author of the document wasn’t revealed.</p> <p dir="ltr">“Jeffrey and Ghislaine have been together as a couple for the last 11 years,” the document read.</p> <p dir="ltr">“They are, contrary to what people think, rarely apart, I almost always see them together.</p> <p dir="ltr">“Jeffrey and Ghislaine share many mutual interests and they have a lot of fun together,” it continued, adding that “they compliment each other really well”.</p> <p dir="ltr">“On top of being partner’s (sic) they are also best of friends.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Never-before-seen photos were also presented to the court, with some showing Ms Maxwell massaging Epstein’s feet. Others showed the pair embracing and kissing in various locations that were often exotic.</p> <p dir="ltr"><img style="width: 500px; height: 281.25px;" src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/7846238/epstein2.jpg" alt="" data-udi="umb://media/c3d5ec6d295b450caa3382b4fac41820" /></p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image:<span> </span></em><em>US District Attorney’s Office</em></p> <p dir="ltr">The images were also seized during the 2019 raid.</p> <p dir="ltr">Prosecutors are expected to call a fourth woman to testify against Ms Maxwell, before wrapping up their case two weeks ahead of schedule.</p> <p dir="ltr">They allege Ms Maxwell played a part in procuring girls and young women for Epstein, the multimillionaire financier who had ties to billionaire Leslie Wexner, Donald Trump and Prince Andrew.</p> <p dir="ltr">No allegations of trafficking have been made against Mr Trump or Mr Wexner.</p> <p dir="ltr">Virginia Giuffre, another woman alleging she was trafficked and abused by Epstein and Ms Maxwell, has alleged she was trafficked to Prince Andrew when she was 17.</p> <p dir="ltr">She is not expected to appear in Ms Maxwell’s trial.</p> <p dir="ltr">The first two women to testify, known by the pseudonyms Jane and Kate, testified that they had been aspiring entertainers when they were approached by Maxwell, who told them Epstein could help them advance their careers.</p> <p dir="ltr"><img style="width: 500px; height: 281.25px;" src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/7846237/epstein3.jpg" alt="" data-udi="umb://media/95c492519b3b47bf83424ce9b107fb7a" /></p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image:<span> </span></em><em>US District Attorney’s Office</em></p> <p dir="ltr">Jane said she was first abused by Epstein during the mid-1990s when she was 14, and that Ms Maxwell trained her in how to sexually satisfy Epstein.</p> <p dir="ltr">She also testified that Epstein personally drove her to meet Mr Trump at his Mar-a-Lago resort.</p> <p dir="ltr">David Rodgers, one of Epstein’s pilots, also testified, telling the court he had seen Jane on at least four flights.</p> <p dir="ltr">“She’s flown with Jeffrey Epstein, Ghislaine Maxwell, and other people as well,” Mr Rodgers said.</p> <p dir="ltr">The second woman to testify, Kate, said she was first abused when she was 17 and was lured into giving Epstein sexual massages.</p> <p dir="ltr">On Tuesday, a woman identified as Carolyn testified that she was a minor when she began having sex with Epstein. She also said Ms Maxwell touched her once while she was preparing to massage Epstein.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I was fully nude and [Maxwell] came in and she felt my boobs and my hips and my buttocks and said that … I had a great body for Mr Epstein and his friends,” Carolyn told the court.</p> <p dir="ltr">While under cross-examination by Ms Maxwell’s lawyer Jeffrey Pagliuca, she was asked whether there was an “incentive for you to stick to your story” after she reached a $USD 3.25 million settlement with a fund to compensate Epstein’s victims, mentioning Ms Maxwell in her claim.</p> <p dir="ltr">“Money will not ever fix what that woman has done to me,” Carolyn said, sobbing.</p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image: Getty Images</em></p>

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Doctored images depict Kate Middleton as victim of abuse

<p dir="ltr">Artist AleXsandro Palombo has made waves for his latest work, a series of doctored images that depict powerful women like Kate Middleton and US Vice President Kamala Harris with bruises on their faces, implying they are the victims of physical abuse.</p> <p dir="ltr">The images have appeared as posters on buildings and bus stops in Italy and Spain, and other women included in the series include Queen Letizia of Spain and European Commission chief Ursula von der Leyen.</p> <p dir="ltr">The text on the images reads, “She reported him. But nobody believed her – but she was left alone. But she was not protected – but he was not stopped. But she was killed anyway.”</p> <blockquote style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" class="instagram-media" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/CWskBjvsP-A/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"></div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"></div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"></div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"></div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"></div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" rel="noopener" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/CWskBjvsP-A/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank">A post shared by aleXsandro Palombo (@alexsandropalombo)</a></p> </div> </blockquote> <p dir="ltr">Palombo said his intention was to “draw attention to the poor responses from politics regarding the problem of gender-based violence and highlights the ineffectiveness of the support and protection system to the victims."</p> <p dir="ltr">He wrote on Instagram, “Why should a woman report the violence if after the report she is not protected by the institutions and ends up being killed anyway? How can a woman victim of abuse and violence still have faith in the institutions?</p> <p dir="ltr">“I only see the Politics inviting women to report but without taking the responsibility of giving protection and support to the victims. A State that does not protect but leaves women alone in the hands of their tormentor becomes a silent accomplice.</p> <p dir="ltr">“There are many associations of volunteers who, with very little means, try to support the victims, but it is to the politics, institutions and the State to assume this responsibility.”</p> <p dir="ltr">According to<span> </span><em>The Sun,<span> </span></em>Kensington Palace did not authorise the usage of Kate Middleton’s image.</p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image: Instagram</em></p>

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Bob Dylan sued for alleged sexual abuse of 12-year-old, denies claims

<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">TRIGGER WARNING: SEXUAL ASSAULT</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">A woman has filed a suit against folk singer-songwriter Bob Dylan, alleging he gave her drugs and alcohol before sexually abusing her in 1965 when she was 12 years old.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The civil lawsuit, filed late on Friday with the New York Supreme Court, said Dylan sexually abused the plaintiff, identified only as JC, at his New York apartment over a six-week period.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The woman, now 68 years old, claimed in the suit that the assault has left “her emotionally scarred and psychologically damaged to this day”.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The suit alleges Dylan established an “emotional connection” with the plaintiff to “lower [J.C.’s] inhibitions with the object of sexually abusing her, which he did, coupled with the provision of drugs, alcohol and threats of physical violence”.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The suit claims that the emotional fallout - including depression, humiliation, and anxiety - are of “permanent and lasting natures” and have prevented the plaintiff “from attending her regular activities”.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">J.C. has brought allegations of assault, battery, false imprisonment and emotional distress against Dylan, who was in his mid-20s at the time, and is seeking unspecified damages and a jury trial.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">“The complaint speaks for itself,” J.C.’s lawyer Daniel Isaacs said.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">“She provided a lot of detailed information regarding the time in question that leaves no doubt that she was with him in the apartment during the time in question.”</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Mr Isaacs also noted that he was able to verify the details in J.C.’s claim with the “best available research”.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Dylan, now 80, denies claims in the lawsuit that he “exploited his status as a musician” to abuse her.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">“This 56-year-old claim is untrue and will be vigorously defended,” Dylan’s spokesman said.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The lawsuit was submitted just before the closure of the New York Child Victims’ Act look-back window, which has allowed victims of childhood sexual abuse to file legal claims that were previously too old to pursue due to a statute of limitations.</span></p>

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“I am sickened”: Prince William blasts racial abuse

<p><span>Prince William has received brutal backlash after condemning the racist abuse of England’s Euro 2020 final players.</span><br /><br /><span>"I am sickened by the racist abuse aimed at England players after last night's match," the royal shared on Monday night from the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge's official Twitter account.</span><br /><br /><span>"It is totally unacceptable that players have to endure this abhorrent behaviour. It must stop now and all those involved should be held accountable."</span><br /><br /><span>The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge were in attendance at the match on Sunday.</span><br /><br /><span>Marcus Rashford, Jadon Sancho and Bukayo Saka, three Black members of England's squad, all received a slurry of racist abuse after they missed their shots during the penalty shoot-out against Italy.</span></p> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> <p dir="ltr">Saka crying breaks my heart man. He's 19, a kid. Most his age are just figuring out what college is. And here is stepping up to take probably most important pen for his country in 50 years.<br /><br />He's already achieved more than most &amp; there's still so much to come. So so proud of him. <a href="https://t.co/IUvBwwsPMq">pic.twitter.com/IUvBwwsPMq</a></p> — angel (@Angelshi_) <a href="https://twitter.com/Angelshi_/status/1414345218523025408?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 11, 2021</a></blockquote> <p><br /><span>Italy won the shoot-out 3-2.</span><br /><br /><span>England lost the Euro 2020 final in heartbreaking circumstances in front of their home fans, despite initially taking the lead.</span><br /><br /><span>However, William’s public call out received an icy response with many questioning why the royal kept silent while his sister-in-law, who is bi-racial, received a flurry of racist abuse while she served in the royal family.</span><br /><br /><span>“For years #sussexsquad has been told that we are ‘race baiters’ for highlighting the racism against Meghan Markle. Tonight, seeing the abuse hurled at Saka, Rashford and Sancho literally proves what we’ve been saying for years,” one person said.</span><br /><br /><span>Another added: “Prince William performative ally ship. His words would have legitimate credibility right now if he had condemned racist abuse towards Meghan Markle and Archie. His silence and complicity fuelled what he condemns today.”</span><br /><br /><span>A third asked: “Were you sickened by the racist abuse aimed at your sister-in-law Meghan Markle for years? What [about] your own blood nephew Archie?” asked a user, amid a sea of other tweets criticising William:</span><br /><br /><span>“I am sickened by the racist abuse aimed at England players after last night’s match. But I love it when it’s aimed at my nephew and SIL Meghan Markle (winks),” another tweet said.</span><br /><br /><span>The official England Football Twitter account tweeted, "We're disgusted that some of our squad — who have given everything for the shirt this summer — have been subjected to discriminatory abuse online after tonight's game. We stand with our players."</span><br /><br /><span>The Football Association — England football's governing body — also released a statement via social media.</span><br /><br /><span>"The FA strongly condemns all forms of discrimination and is appalled by the online racism that has been aimed at some of our England players on social media," a spokesperson said.</span><br /><br /><span>"We could not be clearer that anyone behind such disgusting behaviour is not welcome in following the team. We will do all we can to support the players affected while urging the toughest punishments possible for anyone responsible.</span><br /><br /><span>"We will continue to do everything we can to stamp discrimination out of the game, but we implore government to act quickly and bring in the appropriate legislation so this abuse has real life consequences.</span><br /><br /><span>"Social media companies need to step up and take accountability and action to ban abusers from their platforms, gather evidence that can lead to prosecution and support making their platforms free from this type of abhorrent abuse."</span></p>

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