Alex Cracknell
Downsizing

“Hunk of junk”: Mum’s overly honest caravan ad has internet in stitches

Glastonbury mum Katie Perkins has obviously had enough of the 27-year-old caravan taking up space on her property.

So, in a fit of fury, she took to Facebook Marketplace to try and find a prospective buyer – but soon turned her post into an opportunity to vent a bit of pent-up rage at the “monstrosity” that had been plaguing her for so long.

The UK woman was definitely a little too honest in her expletive-laden ad, and the post quickly went viral due to her astonishingly blunt descriptions.

“It is a tin shed on wheels,” she wrote.

“It is f***ing hot in the summer. It is f***ing freezing in the winter. It even grows icicles on the inside.”

She adds that the oven and fridge are equally rubbish, but the microwave is “pretty decent.”

“Get this hunk of junk off my f***ing land,” she pleads.

“I’d love to say it’s beautiful, but I’d be lying. I’d love to say I loved living in it, but I’d be lying.”

The listing has been shared more than 1,000 times and racked up hundreds of comments as people commended her for the refreshing honesty, calling it the “best ad ever”.

Check out the images of the caravan in the gallery below, and here also is the full (slightly cleaned up) post in all its glory:

“YES IT'S STILL AVAILABLE - I WILL. REMOVE ONCE IT HAS GONE.

IT IS AN ANCIENT 27 YEAR OLD CARAVAN. 32FT x 10FT, 2 BED STATIC.

IT HAS BEEN LIVED IN BY A FAMILY OF 7 (WE WERE A FAMILY OF 4 🤰⚠️) FOR 7 YEARS ONSITE WHILST BUILDING OUR DREAM HOME, WHICH TURNED INTO A F***ING NIGHTMARE.

IT IS NOT PRISTINE.

IT IS NOT PRETTY.

IT IS A TIN SHED ON WHEELS.

IT IS F***ING HOT IN THE SUMMER.

IT IS F***ING FREEZING IN THE WINTER.

IT EVEN GROWS ICICLES ON THE INSIDE. IT COULD DO WITH FULL REPLACEMENT OF CARPETS.

IT NEEDS A GOOD BLEACH CLEAN THROUGHOUT.

IT HAS A SHIT OVEN.

IT HAS A SHIT HOB.

IT HAS A SHIT FRIDGE.

KIDS WERE POTTY TRAINED IN IT.

DOG WAS POTTY TRAINED IN IT.

IT HAS BEEN USED AS STORAGE FOR THE LAST 9 MONTHS.

NEXT STOP THE F***ING CHICKENS ARE GOING IN IT.

IT DOES HAVE A PRETTY DECENT MICROWAVE, ALBEIT CHEAP MORRISONS ONE.

IT ALSO HAS EXTRAS!

COUPLE OLD SHOES IN THE WARDROBE.

ABSTRACT ART, ONE OF A KIND, COURTESY OF THE CHILDREN.

OLD BOTTLES OF BOOZE UNDER THE SINK.

PRETTY SURE THERE'S EVEN A SLOW COOKER THAT WAS ONLY USED ONCE?

BEDS THAT HAVE BEEN DESTROYED AND I CANNOT BE F***ED TO REMOVE.

I’M SURE IF YOU ARE LOOKING AT IT YOU CAN USE IT FOR SOMETHING, I DON'T GIVE A F**K WHAT.

I WANT OFFERS.....I DON'T EXPECT ALOT BUT SOMETHING WOULD BE NICE.

F**K IT - IF YOU TRUELY WANT THIS F***ING MONSTROSITY THEN I WILL TRADE IT FOR A COUPLE BOXES OF HUBBY'S FAVOURITE RED WINE - JAMMY RED ROO OR JAM SHED.

GET THIS HUNK OF JUNK OFF MY F***ING LAND.

I'D LOVE TO SAY IT'S F***ING BEAUTIFUL, BUT I'D BE LYING.

I'D LOVE TO SAY I LOVED LIVING IN IT, BUT I'D BE LYING.

I'D LOVE TO SAY I'D LOOK FORWARD TO A CARAVAN HOLIDAY, BUT GUESS WHAT...?

I'D BE LYING.”

… and if you’re still game to read the real thing, take a deep breath, be warned, and click here.

Images: Facebook Marketplace

Tags:
downsizing, For Sale, caravan, hilarious, Viral