How I decided that cancer was not my enemy
Karina Godwin is considered by many as one of the most gifted healers of our times with an international clientele. She mastered significant life change due to trauma and most recently after facing a highly aggressive and rare cancer.
I remember the day I was diagnosed with cancer like it was yesterday… its memory has been engraved into my brain. I woke up tired, and just like every morning wearily contemplated the long list of items on my ‘to do’ list for work and home. I caught up with a group of girlfriends over breakfast and laughed and moaned over our collective wins and problems. It seemed just like any other morning as I drove to my weekly myotherapy treatment.
And that’s where my normal went out the window, where my definition of normal failed to be something I knew and became a confusing flurry of doctors and tests and firsts. My life would never be the same again. Inside my abdomen was hiding a tumour the size of a small football, that had just compressed my other organs enough to cause me to arch upwards in pain.
When I got the call from my doctor telling me that I needed to get to a hospital urgently, it was because the probable diagnosis was a very rare and aggressive cancer that had low rates of recovery. My fifteen years of nursing flashed through my mind as I saw the few people I’d seen with that kind of cancer and the poor outcomes they’d experienced. Every day counted when it was this serious.
I was beyond terrified as I contemplated not seeing my ten-year-old grow up or grandchildren from our five children… normal just got nasty and I didn’t like it!
At the hospital, I tried to focus closely on what I was hearing as they did all the tests. It helped that they spoke medical talk to me that I interpreted for my husband to understand, but nothing they had to say was reassuring. I had a fight on my hands no matter which way you looked at it.
We took our time to process the news, but we had to act fast. With my background in both nursing and alternative therapies, I knew that attitude was everything, and could well make the difference to my survival. I knew that I had to be careful of what I said and how I said it, to enable me to find some sort of positivity. This extended to how I interacted with those around me. We decided there and then to filter what we were telling people and for the time being limit it to the need to know, as this would help. I knew that those around me would be shattered, so we were choosy about who and what we told. I needed to get my head around things first.
It was so incredibly important for me to see the cancer for what it was and what I’d always believed it to be… and that is a wakeup call! I’ve never believed that you’re sick because you have cancer, I believed that you get cancer because something in your body isn’t right. My immune system was either not working and/or struggling to cope with the disease. I gave up sugar and preservatives and began to fill my diet with fresh water, vegetables and fruit, to provide it with the nutrients to feed my immune system’s ability to fight.
I decided that cancer was not my enemy, and chose to change my lifestyle to assist my body to do what it was made to do: heal and protect the body. I focused upon actions that were empowering, for I knew that the whole process of cancer and its treatments could be disempowering and even soul destroying. I was convinced that I knew a better way which could support me during the most challenging time of my life.
The greatest secret to my recovery was my attitude. I knew that it was more serious than I could imagine and that the odds were against me. I also knew through my work in healing that what I focused upon would increase, so I tried to focus on what I could find that was positive. We had found my cancer, Melbourne has one of the world-leading surgeons for this type of cancer, I had my husband and a great support network and I wasn’t dead yet. That was important, because my fear wanted to take me to my funeral. I tried to be calm but the reality was that my fear was rampant.
Years ago, when healing my clients with anxiety through Meliae Intuitive Healing, I created a technique I called fear mastery, to enable them to exist through their fear. Now it was my turn. I would notice when I was in fear (which in the beginning was almost all the time), and I would talk to it and tell it that I was in charge now and to stop it. I started imagining that I could breathe past the confines of my lungs and imagined breathing into my fear, and where I was feeling it in my body. I would keep breathing until the fear eased and I became more peaceful. I did this every time I felt fear rising and it worked. I could think now and I could work on my plan.
I saw so many doctors and medicos. My husband came to them all, holding my hand, holding me steady and taking notes. I can’t tell you what a difference that made, for when I faltered I would see his scared smile and know that it was possible to be ok regardless of what happened to me. And wow, was a lot going to happen. I worked through my options and chose to initially combine surgery with Meliae Intuitive Healing and lifestyle changes. There wasn’t a lot to choose from, but I wanted to be sure I believed in everything I chose for my treatment. I had worked with cancer clients before and was confident I could heal the causes of the tumour and the energy imbalances that contributed to it.
My choices wouldn’t have been everyone’s treatment path and that became abundantly clear with everyone expressing their opinion. I heard through the grapevine that I would die because I was choosing healing over chemotherapy! Fascinating really, especially as chemotherapy was not an option, as it simply doesn’t work with my type of tumour. I knew they meant well, but I also knew that I had to do what was right for me. If they only knew how they were contributing to my fear!
As I embarked upon my treatment, I had the massive surgery over several hours, supported by distant energy healing, and survived it. The first step was done, now to my recovery. It didn’t go so well, with serious complications taking a month to clear to finally go home. With the exception of one, every one of those days saw me positive, as I managed my fear through the fear mastery technique. I allowed myself to fall apart and feel the worst of my fears and I continue to use those same techniques.
If you, or someone you love has just been diagnosed with cancer, here are my suggestions to stay positive:
- Breathe, it’ll help you be clear on what to do.
- Take a loved one or friend with you to your appointments for support to take notes.
- Notice your fear and use the above fear mastery technique.
- Believe that you can survive regardless of what you’re facing, I did!
- Listen carefully to what the Doctors are saying, their knowledge is valuable and ask as many questions as many times as you need until you understand.
- Do not Google: it doesn’t help at all and only makes things worse. According to Google, I should be dead!
- Embrace whatever treatment you decide is right for you.
- Don’t limit yourself, explore all the options for treatment and support of your body, mind and spirit. Many will combine to create great results.
- Meditate, it helps with the fear, clarity and being positive.
Cancer has its challenges and I’d never say I enjoyed the ride, but it has made me a better person. I survived despite the odds I was given; I just chose to not be one of the people who didn’t make it. Those odds didn’t apply to me as far as I was concerned, they related to people in the past. I wish you well on your journey…. and don’t forget to breathe!