Wed, 12 Jun, 2019
Mother mortified by daycare worker's complaint about her son
A mother has been shocked after a daycare worker complained about her son’s language.
The woman took to online parenting forum Mumsnet to share her frustration after the manager of her daycare pulled her aside to have a serious chat about her two-year-old son.
“She closed the door and said in a very serious voice that my DS [dear son] had told one of the workers that he liked his penis when she was changing his nappy. Then directly afterwards he said to some of the children that he likes his penis,” the mother wrote.
“So I said, ‘OK. I’m not sure what you want me to do. I think most little boys like touching their penises.’
“She said that she understands that, but it’s inappropriate for him to use that sort of language in the nursery setting.”
The manager said “other parents may not want their children, particularly the little girls, to hear that word”, and she told the son to stop saying the word because “it wasn’t a nice thing to say”.
“I got quite angry and said that I really don’t appreciate her doing that because it’s not a bad word and her telling him that it is will make him think it’s a dirty or bad thing, when it’s actually the correct word for it.”
The manager maintained that the mother should teach her son “what is appropriate and what is not” in a group setting.
“I said, ‘Absolutely not. I’m not giving my child a complex or making him think his body is something to be ashamed of. He’s 2 for god’s sake! He doesn’t understand anything about what is socially appropriate and telling him that penis is a bad word seems bizarre. And furthermore, I do not want you or anyone else to tell him not to say it either.’”
The mother went on to tell her husband about the incident, but he ended up questioning her insistence on the issue.
“He said everyone here says willy and it’s more socially acceptable. He said it was all my fault and the nursery was correct. I am genuinely blown away. Was I wrong?”
The majority of the forum users sided with the mother.
“God forbid we call body parts by their actual name,” one commented.
“Of course there’s nothing bad about the word. Good on you for being so firm and calm and logical,” another added.
Some suggested that context should be considered.
“I don’t think the problem is with the word penis so much as the context of him running about saying, ‘l like my penis’,” one wrote.