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Objects that are new are shiny and robust. They seldom require much attention to keep them safe and exciting. Things with a little more age tend to be somewhat more delicate, and have usually lost their sheen. Just as this applies to physical objects (and living creatures), this idea is a useful way to look at relationships. At the beginning of its life, it requires little in the way of nourishment to flourish, but will want some tending to as it ages if it is to last the distance.

Romantic relationships have the sparkle of romance and attraction to separate them from ordinary friendships, and some find it difficult to sustain this after a number of years. But we have a number of tips and ways to approach your partnership that could help you rekindle the romance in your not-so-youthful relationship.

1. Listen with empathy

Oftentimes, our friends are wonderful when we wish to vent about something. We can share a meal together and talk about what’s bothering us, or let off steam over a cup of coffee. Our romantic partners, however, should listen to us and do their best to empathise. Being understood, and feeling like our fears, worries, and frustrations are heard helps spark feelings of romance and forges a deeper connection with our partner.

2. Compliment each other

Just as when your relationship was in its infancy, a sincere compliment can inspire giddy feelings of romance between two people. Take the time to notice things about your partner that you appreciate, and make sincere observations to them – especially if it is something they have done with intention. Do you like the way they look in an outfit they have picked out? Tell them. Are you impressed by the way they play tirelessly with your grandchildren? Let them know. Heartfelt compliments can buoy our partners up and keep your romance feeling youthful.

3. Make fun

Ageing relationships can stagnate in routine, so it’s important to make an effort to find fun things to do together. Surprise each other with day trips to somewhere you’ve never been. Find a hobby that interests the both of you and take it up. Take a class together. Go and see a comedian. There are so many fun activities you can do to liven up your routine – fresh air will soon have blown the cobwebs off that romance.

4. Strut your stuff

If you want to bring back those butterfly moments in your marriage, consider the way you present yourself to your partner. That doesn’t have to mean dressing up every day. Putting in a little extra effort when you know you are going to be spending time with them is a simple way of showing that you care about looking nice for them. This gesture of love is not only important to your partner; it is great for your own self esteem. Nothing inspires romance like a little self-care.

What is your best tip to rekindle a roaring romance that has faded to embers?